Worst at Night...

SirQwerty

SirQwerty

Fapstronaut
Learning a lot about myself and the way other people, and the world, works on this journey. I no longer desire porn, and am doing SR, so P and O are starting to become less of an issue.

However, I've got an issue, and I don't know how to feel about it. I probably need to stop this habit too, I just have a hard time doing it.

Humping my pillow at night due to fantasies of a real relationship. My urges get so bad at night that I've tried to look up p*rn on my smart TV in my bedroom, so I hide my remote so I can't access it.

It seems this has become a coping mechanism because I work very hard during the day, and I don't interact with many people (In a nutshell, I can't relate to most people, I'm living for the future so I see life as work and endurance. It will pay off). However, I feel I need to kick this habit somehow. During the day, I feel I have full control and no desire, but it's at night when it gets tough. I sleep with my phone in another room, and without the TV on. I've tried everything from reading, getting up and praying in the middle of the night (Probably need to do this more), and taking meltonin to sleep longer.

Part of this is probably hormones I'm sure, but I'm not trying to make excuses. It's like a whole new switch goes off once I get in bed.

Anyone struggle with the same, or have any advice?

Thank you
 
Hey man, this habit that you've labeled ''embarassing habit'' is not weird in my estimation. It's very normal to want sexual stimulation, you've just conditioned it in a different way. Humping your pillow or whatever relatively flat surface, pressing your genitals between your stomach and a surface is called 'prone masturbation'. You create a lot of pressure in your penis by masturbating in this manner, which is actually physically not good for your penis; there is a reason it is called traumatic masturbation syndrome. (Trauma as in physical trauma). This habit is actually associated with premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction and delayed ejaculation. (Who knows maybe it also has a different effect on your brain than regular masturbation). Maybe by knowing these cons you have more reason to stop engaging in this habit, which will help you orient yourself towards not doing it more. Hope this helps. Goodluck!
 
NfBigGlP said:
Have you tried fasting? I’ve had that same issue.
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I have, I'm probably going to do it more often though. It is very helpful, and when I did in the past, a "layer" of this addiction was shed off. Really puts things in perspective when you deny your needs and desires.

UlyssesResists said:
I've had ongoing struggles with insomnia. I do think it's related to nofap withdrawl and testosterone SR build up. I'm getting success now.
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I've just read your posts, thank you! I take melatonin and that helps sometimes but I still get up in the middle of the night.

Gid said:
Humping your pillow or whatever relatively flat surface, pressing your genitals between your stomach and a surface is called 'prone masturbation'.
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I've heard of this, thank you for the info! I'll keep this in mind for sure. I really hate that my libido has been so high, it feels out of control honestly. I try not to think on it and try to focus on other things, but it always comes up.
I tried applying this knowledge last night but I still gave into 'proning'. I'll have to do better.

Thank you all for your responses so far
 
Melatonin does end up waking you up in the middle of the night. I only use it once in a while if I have a streak of bad sleep that I need to stop, but using it regularly was not be helpful for me.
 
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This is not so much PMO related directly, but if you're having issues with a TV in your bedroom, why have the TV at all? Certain instances, like living in a share-house, can make it somewhat mandatory.

But multiple studies and books link sleeping without a TV, or phones as you mentioned, in your bedroom dramatically improves sleep quality. The bedroom should only be for two things: sleep, and spending time with somebody you love. Leave the TV in the living room. It encourages better habits.
 
You need a proper reward system. Your lifestyle is extreme basis and you use extreme means to maintain it. It would not be sustainable.

Wanking hard is a sign you've already lost it. It's mainly for avoidance and escapism and desperate self therapy reasons.
 
imfinallyquitting said:
But multiple studies and books link sleeping without a TV, or phones as you mentioned, in your bedroom dramatically improves sleep quality. The bedroom should only be for two things: sleep, and spending time with somebody you love. Leave the TV in the living room. It encourages better habits.
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I agree, I sleep so much better without the TV and phone. I've hidden my remote so I don't watch TV anymore, and that has been better, but I'm still fighting thoughts when I wake up breifly in the middle of the night.

Littlefella said:
You need a proper reward system. Your lifestyle is extreme basis and you use extreme means to maintain it. It would not be sustainable.

Wanking hard is a sign you've already lost it. It's mainly for avoidance and escapism and desperate self therapy reasons.
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I can understand, I've felt this way. I'm struggling to see what would be "rewarding" for me at this point. I need to change my mindset because I just feel like life is work and self-denial, gotten used to the routine. I'll just have to do some introspection, interesting point you brought out here.

Thank you
 
I don't know what to advise you, but I wish you success. I don't have time to think about anything right now because I'm in my last year at university and I still have a lot to do. It's good that I found https://academized.com/pay-for-thesis and I don't have to worry about the thesis at least. I have to take two more exams and I hope I will pass. I get very little sleep because of this..
 
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SirQwerty said:
Learning a lot about myself and the way other people, and the world, works on this journey. I no longer desire porn, and am doing SR, so P and O are starting to become less of an issue.

However, I've got an issue, and I don't know how to feel about it. I probably need to stop this habit too, I just have a hard time doing it.

Humping my pillow at night due to fantasies of a real relationship. My urges get so bad at night that I've tried to look up p*rn on my smart TV in my bedroom, so I hide my remote so I can't access it.

It seems this has become a coping mechanism because I work very hard during the day, and I don't interact with many people (In a nutshell, I can't relate to most people, I'm living for the future so I see life as work and endurance. It will pay off). However, I feel I need to kick this habit somehow. During the day, I feel I have full control and no desire, but it's at night when it gets tough. I sleep with my phone in another room, and without the TV on. I've tried everything from reading, getting up and praying in the middle of the night (Probably need to do this more), and taking meltonin to sleep longer.

Part of this is probably hormones I'm sure, but I'm not trying to make excuses. It's like a whole new switch goes off once I get in bed.

Anyone struggle with the same, or have any advice?

Thank you
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Sounds like you need some menaingful connections. It appears that only part of your life is fulfilling. You need to create a healthy social life.
 
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