worst date ever

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by goodnice 2.0, May 27, 2019.

  1. I haven’t been on many dates but man this one was bad

    I was all excited for this. I got all dressed up, had everything set up. Then she shows up in like pajamas

    We watched avengers infinity war at my place.
    She showed up 45 min late to dinner and was making stupid questions during the whole movie and spent half the movie on her phone on instagram and snapchat.

    I didn’t make any moves cuz i was pissed honestly. I really wanted to have my first kiss with her but i was so turned off by her just scrolling through instagram every 10 min during the movie that I didn’t even attempt or have any romantic thoughts towards her

    I should have vocalized more that she should get off her phone but i thought it’s her choice if she wants to do that. At the end i kinda gently told her that she missed a lot of the movie and she said she understood the main plot. Right...

    And she asked if i want to watch endgame tomorrow
  2. Well obviously she isn't uninterested otherwise she wouldn't have asked. She might have been nervous and trying to seem nonchalant by keeping to her phone. Do you want her or not is the question.
  3. not particularly after this
    kropo82 likes this.
  4. Then turn her down. With that angelic face of yours you can afford to be picky lol
  5. Thanks man
    “Her attention becomes more fragmented, her attitude increases, and she’s less willing to put work into the interaction, symptoms that come from receiving an overload of male attention via a tool that seems to be perfectly designed for it”

    She was literally snap chatting just the best moments like she asked me to pause the video when black panther came on so she could post a pic on her story. There were so many other red flags. For example we were supposed to get dinner together but when she arrived 45 min late, she said she had already eaten a burger and ice cream. Then later she complained of having a stomach ache and asked me for medicine. She also asked to use my iphone charger, which i let her. big mistake
  6. Angus McGyver

    Angus McGyver Fapstronaut

    Although I haven't had plenty of dating experiences myself, I am old enough to definitely know how to separate the good girls/women from the bad ones quite fast (within minutes). You will also gain that screening-skill with more encounters and few more years of life-experience on your back.
    It definitely sounds like she isn't worth pursuing at all. By reading your post, following red-flags pop up immediately:

    -Being glued to her phone means she is not only showing disinterest and disrespect for your presence but also craving attention through the web. In other words, she is very insecure of her own self-worth and hence seeks approval from other people. Only insecure and immature women crave attention from the outside world whereas the good ones never have such a need in the first place.
    Also, that means she can't be present in the moment, hence not appreciating the small things in life. These kind of women will never be happy, no matter what you give them.

    -Poor attitude by not showing up on time and not even apologize for it. By this action alone, she doesn't only disrespect you and your time but also puts herself high up on the pedestal and expects everything looking up to her and serve her, regardless of her poor attitude. A man of value puts her in her place by not accepting this kind of behavior and is ready to show her the door if no sincere apology or remorse is shown. A good woman would have informed you ahead of time she's going to be late and sincerely apologize for it upon arrival.

    -By not dressing up even a little and making herself look beautiful for you means she doesn't really care about you. Any woman of value would make an effort to make herself look good for you.

    -By bitching, complaining and whining about little stomach-aches (unless they are severe and needs a visit to the hospital) and making it the center of attention goes back to the first point. She craves attention and wants you to serve her, regardless of her attitude.

    If I was you, I would show her the door right away and only give her a second chance/attempt if she accepted the following ultimatum:
    "Apologize for the bad attitude plus petty and poor behavior you showed last time at my place and instead behave sweet, courteous and well this time. If you are not willing to agree on this and make it better this time, Good Bye"
    justafriend and goodnice 2.0 like this.
  7. @Angus McGyver budaboombudabing my friend. Thank you so much for this comment. It resonates with me

    Omg you 200% nailed it. She seemed so insecure constantly checking her snapchat and seeing how many people viewed it. And scrolling mindlessly through instagram. She seems very insecure and immature and attention seeking., this is why i deleted social media over a year ago. It’s so awful what it does, and how fake and attached people become because of it:(

    Ya she texted me 5 min beforehand saying she would be 30 min late. I said no worries. I had waited the whole time to eat out of courtesy so i could eat withher... but then when she comes she says she already ate

    It honestly seems like she was testing me, asking me for my charger, water, hot cheetos, medicine. And another thing is that last week when we got dinner, when we were paying for our food, she said “i don’t have dining dollars” (dining dollars are used to buy food on campus but real money can be used as well), and she paused a bit and i suspected she was waiting to see if i would pay for her meal. i sensed that and walked to go find a table. She doesn’t deserve me pay for her meal, i don’t owe her anything

    And yes! i like sweet courteous respectful women. i guess this is a learning experience to be able to recognize and weed out the bad ones
    I just feel kind of stoopid, because before the date i was all stressing, reading a book about attraction/seduction, getting advice from a friend on setting up the date and stuff. I prepared, dressed up, got a haircut, was on time, even a bit early, when she said she was coming late, i said don’t worry. I set up the tv, rented the movie, and was looking forward to seeing it with her eventhough i had already watched infinitywars before. I love that movie btw:)

    Thanks again for taking the time to reply. Have a great day mate
    justafriend likes this.
  8. Daniel Forster

    Daniel Forster Fapstronaut

    Well, what is you intention with her? Are you looking for a gf? - In that case she isnt the one. But if you just wanna have a good time it would be better to just go the point, you know: forget about the movie, go right to action say hey you can do something better than scrolling through instagram then make your move and if she cuts you, forget about her, otherwise enjoy your time.
    goodnice 2.0 likes this.
  9. Either. I wanted to have a good time and if she was worthy, she could be a potential gf but i got really let down lol
  10. Zapster21

    Zapster21 Fapstronaut

    Let her go! She sounds absolutely horrible! Would not waste a second more on a girl like that...
    FX-05 and goodnice 2.0 like this.
  11. Phubbing is so uncouth and so is being late and not notifying a change of dinner plans. Don't feel stupid for putting your best foot forward and levelling yourself up. I know more females are liking that sort of movie but consider maybe it just wasn't interesting her to pay full attention to. It's not exactly a cue for romance. They should remake Casablanca
    goodnice 2.0 likes this.
  12. tru. maybe top gun would have been better
    Deleted Account likes this.
  13. Is that a romance movie? If you recommend it, i’ll add it to my movie list
  14. Are you trolling nofap lol
  16. I'm a bit worried about this when I do end up dating tbh, it guts me when you're trying to talk to someone and they're constantly distracted by their phone. Of course, it's an addiction all in itself but I can't help but feel that my potential dating pool's turning into more of a pond by having 'compulsive social media use during quality time' as a red flag.

    Then add to that the fact that I'm a slightly mental metalhead/breakcore freak who doesn't want to be with someone who drinks or uses drugs and it's more like a puddle...
    Ahh well, fuck it :D

    I commend your inner strength OP, I've ignored the social media addiction red flag before, it neither gets better nor ends well. *remembers last relationship* yeah... nope.
    goodnice 2.0 and Deleted Account like this.
  17. Angus McGyver

    Angus McGyver Fapstronaut

    No worries mate! Another easy way to find out about her character is just to consider the following simple question(s):
    -What is she majoring in? If the answer is STEM, accounting, law or any other related and lucrative field (that requires an effort, ambition and focus), she is more likely to have a good character since that indicates goals, dreams, and ambitions in life. Women with any of those are mostly worth pursuing as they are ready to sacrifice something higher than themselves.
    If the answer lies within the humanities, English, history, or anything with -studies attached to it, run for the door quickly. People majoring in these fields have a very bleak future with plenty of student debt plus they get bombarded with lots of politically correct indoctrination and social conditioning as well.

    -Does she have any dreams, goals and ambitions in life overall? If the answer is: "Not really, I don't know, I will see what happens, I don't really care, I am just having a good time now and worry about the future later", indicates that she has no direction, ambition or purpose in life and you should head for the exit ASAP.
    If she is just floating around (like a steam-liner drifting on the ocean without a captain) expecting life to give something to her without effort, she won't be able to figure this out when in a relationship either, hence feeling frustrated, sad, directionless, depressed, angry and those characteristics will have a hard toll on you and drain you off energy.

    I remember after my last semester in college (upon graduation) when I was out on a date or two with a Ukrainian girl I had known for some time and it was one of the best experiences I have ever had. Compared to most Western women these days, she was sweet and tender, dressed herself up, never put up an attitude, never complained, bitched or moaned about anything (which could have to do with the fact she grew up during post-Soviet years where luxuries and commodities were scarce).
    Unfortunately, I was not able to date her further due to the practical difficulties with large distances and the demanding grad-school time (I lived in AZ and she in NC shortly after that) but still, I remember it with lots of joy.
    Last edited: May 28, 2019
  18. The Dave

    The Dave Fapstronaut


    Dont be a people pleaser like i was for years.
    Instead be vocal. Maybe Make it a joke such as " am i boring you?" and gauge her reaction. If she gets uppity, time to bounce. If she realises its a tad rude, you can progress from there.

    Respect yourself and others will respect you.
  19. You're uh... You're dismissing an awful lot of people as a lower class there, and seem to hold the opinion that the subject one is educated in solely defines their character... And you're talking about indoctrination and conditioning? The belief you expressed there is the epitome of cultural indoctrination and social conditioning.

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