1. Welcome to NoFap! We have disabled new forum accounts from being registered for the time being. In the meantime, you can join our weekly accountability groups.
    Dismiss Notice

WTF is wrong with me?

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by MSTie, Dec 19, 2017.

  1. MSTie

    MSTie Fapstronaut

    145
    86
    28
    Honestly, there are times when I just wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.

    I've PMO'd five times this morning alone. Five.

    I know what I want. I know what I need to do. Yet I always seem to fall back into addiction. Sometimes it feels like there's no way out.

    Sorry for the post. Just needed to sound off a little.
     
    Kenny Lee and truthseeker17 like this.
  2. 57yrold

    57yrold Fapstronaut

    122
    190
    43
    Getting rid of this shit is really, really difficult.

    The thing that helped me the most is reading as much as I could about porn addiction, PMO, rebooting, etc.

    Start with yourbrainonporn.com and rebootnation.org

    This site, nofap.com has some great information too.

    The more you know, the better armed you'll be for the battle.

    And find something to replace the time you used to PMO. Meditate, Exercise, Go for walks in nature.

    Anything to keep your eyes off the pixels and your hands off your junk.

    Set a goal, then set some strict rules that you think will get you there. Then stay strong, educate yourself, and achieve that goal! You can do it!
     
  3. Honestly for me it takes some willpower at first to stop watching porn. After a week or so the urges to watch porn rapidly fades away. Regardless of that I agree with the 57 year old poster above me with the distraction techniques they posted; like to go for a walk in a calming place (don't walk too far if the outside is snowy like it is for me) or exercise.

    But as far as going on a porn binge and doing it five times in one morning is a feeling I don't ever remember happening.
     
  4. Sh123

    Sh123 Fapstronaut

    30
    18
    8
    I feel your pain.

    This crap is tough, no doubt about it.

    The thing is that release that feels so damn good, at the moment, is fake. And it pales in comparison to the feeling of release from the real thing.

    Here it is, for me at least. It's easy, no foreplay, no working up to it. Just drop trou, boot up and get off. It's easy and gratifying, for a second that is. Then you feel like shit. At least I do.

    I will tell you this, I'm on day 3 and I can say without I doubt I'm going nuts for some release. But waking up with MW feels pretty good too, and somewhat normal.

    I won't lie, I came really friggn close last night to saying "f it" I need to O and just resetting my counter. Damn it was hard, no pun intended, but I made it through.

    Good luck, keep your head held high.
     
    sakeen, MSTie and Kenny Lee like this.
  5. Rob_B_

    Rob_B_ Fapstronaut

    That really was the key for me, too. You have to know the enemy in order to beat it.

    Very true!

    Again, spot on. If you don't know what you're aiming for, you'll never know if you got there.

    That being said, I also do think that improvement is a process, not (just) an aim, so set goals that can evolve as your progress, to always keep you moving forward.
     
    LavaMe and 57yrold like this.
  6. Onehope

    Onehope Fapstronaut


    I totally get it yet, you are here, feeling the guilt, so not all is lost, try again, harder this time, and never give up.
     
    MSTie likes this.
  7. LavaMe

    LavaMe Fapstronaut

    I know that awful feeling. But it is a good thing. You have a moment of clarity about your behavior. Don’t beat yourself up over it. But remember this moment. Keep this feeling in mind when the false, temporary pleasure of PMO tempts you. But also try to imagine what life free from PMO is like. Positive and negative motivation are both helpful.
     
    MSTie and Sh123 like this.
  8. truthseeker17

    truthseeker17 Fapstronaut

    165
    1,358
    123
    When you are at your lowest, you can only go up! BE POSITIVE!

    Now it's not the time to be angry with yourself, it will make your situation only worse. It happend, it's already history. You still can change your futureself.
    The people above gave you some great advice, see what works for you. Everyone is different, find you strength in something which is important and loved to you. When you succeed, people are not going to ask you how many times you failed. It's not about that. It's about that one time breaking through, being successful and winning the competition!

    Goodluck friend, you can do it!
     
    MSTie and LavaMe like this.
  9. MSTie likes this.
  10. Kenny Lee

    Kenny Lee New Fapstronaut

    1
    1
    3
    I can relate to you brother... I am a new member in nofap and I just signed up for an account today right after I did PMO. I was 42 years old and I started this shit since 11-12 years old. I had try quitting it for 107 times but I found myself having relapse for the 108 times - I don't think I gonna get out of it....

    I found this forum because I just did a google search under "Porn addiction for almost 40 years" and a link brought me here. I read some of the post and comment and for the first time I discovered I wasnt alone....

    I am not sure if this forum gonna help me quit that shit which I cant stop myself from eating... but it sure felt good knowing I am not alone in this battle and I can relate to many of your real life story here....

    Peace to all and I hope to read more success story and get some encouragement to quit is possible.
     
    Sh123 likes this.
  11. Tovarasu

    Tovarasu Fapstronaut

    6
    4
    3
    I couldn't pass 30 days until i limited my contact with PCs - only at work - and with smartphones only text and calls. This addiction is related to internet if you can give up on those to it will be a looot easier. Its like when you are an alcoholic in recovery you get rid of your booze that you have in the house, how do you want to quit porn addiction when you are 1 click away, when the temptation is right in front of you ?
     
    MSTie and Kenny Lee like this.
  12. I'm 62 - if I'd had this Hi Speed Internet Porn in my 20s, I'm certain I'd have done that.

    To the OP: It's harder (heh heh) because you're young - but you have so much more to gain, too. You don't have to squander decades of your life on this shit (magazines and 8mm peep shows burnt up tons of my time and relationship potential for many years).

    Nobody says this is easy. They just say it's worth it.
     
    MSTie and 57yrold like this.
  13. Rob_B_

    Rob_B_ Fapstronaut

  14. bike-wrench

    bike-wrench Fapstronaut

    @Rob_B_ - Thanks for taggin' me in... but i don't think these guys need me. There are great suggestions up there! If these guys follow the suggestions they're putting out, and learn from one another, they'll do fine.

    What do I see?
    • Get some info here and on Your Brain on Porn. There's a glossary linked at the top of the page. It's short, so you can start with that;
    • Fill your time with healthy stuff;
    • Set a goal
    • If it gets bad, go for a walk. Get out of the house!
    • Limit your internet contact.
    You guys are tellin' YOURSELVES what to do.

    (@namaycush linked to one of my posts. I'm honored. I didn't even pay him to do that.)

    @Kenny Lee, I'm as old as you. It's true that it's difficult* for the young guys, but it's no walk in the park for any of us, and each of us has our own battle to fight. (*You'll notice, when you write around here, it's tough NOT to make puns on words like "hard" and "beat".)

    Because I'm a self-aggrandizing PITA, I want to throw in my usual comment about motivation. Motivation wanes after a while if you don't do something to remind yourself of it. I like to tell people to write down their motivations and put 'em where they're easy to find (including on your PHONES, dammit!) and read 'em at least twice a day, and when you're feeling like you'll slip.

    And, of course... do the next right thing.
     
    soberhenry, MSTie and Torn like this.
  15. Rob_B_

    Rob_B_ Fapstronaut

    Just thought you ought to see what good things people are saying about you behind your back. :)

    So true, in every area of life.

    For me, that one sentence there makes a huge difference, turning a long journey into one-step-at-a-time one. Sort of like the 'today I will not use...'.

    Thanks again, @bike-wrench - be good!
     
  16. bike-wrench

    bike-wrench Fapstronaut

    Thanks, @Rob_B_ ... and may I remind you, if people are sayin' NOT good things behind my back, you don't have to be so diligent about bringing them up to me. Maybe I'd rather not know...

    HAH!
     
    Rob_B_ likes this.
  17. MSTie

    MSTie Fapstronaut

    145
    86
    28
    Well, a day’s passed since my self-pitying rant. Now I’m back on the wagon, grappling with those early withdrawal symptoms. Nevertheless, I still went Christmas shopping.

    I just wanted to thank everyone who’s offered encouragement and advice. The sense of community here is really quite special, as are all of you. Cheers!
     
  18. You can do it :emoji_muscle:
     
    MSTie and kjohn like this.
  19. MellowFellow

    MellowFellow Fapstronaut

    It's crazy how many times I can PMO in a day/week since my addiction worsened this year. Used to be 1-3 times a week, now at least 2 a day and sometimes 6. So weird.
     
  20. bike-wrench

    bike-wrench Fapstronaut

    Common problem with addiction; seeking more and more stimulation, and/or needing more to get the same effect. If there was any question about whether you needed to be here, @MellowFellow, I hope this puts that question to rest.
     
    MellowFellow likes this.

Share This Page