1. Welcome to NoFap! We have disabled new forum accounts from being registered for the time being. In the meantime, you can join our weekly accountability groups.
    Dismiss Notice

You know what is the most frustrating part of all this for me....

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Jesb, Aug 5, 2017.

  1. Jesb

    Jesb Fapstronaut

    62
    60
    28
    I'm 39 in the best shape I've ever been, I go out to the mall today and so many girls today were checking me out. All types too. Mothers, or milfs as some call them. Young girls, even girls with bf's... But I didn't act on any of them for the simple fact I can't finish the job in the bedroom right now.... I have a date tomorrow with a hot girl and I just don't know where this can go....
     
    Fork2323 and Endlessknight like this.
  2. Endlessknight

    Endlessknight Fapstronaut

    52
    35
    18
    Hey, Jesb. I'm the same age in the exact same situation. I can totally commiserate. One day 20 of my reboot so hoping it works for me.
     
  3. Infern0

    Infern0 Fapstronaut

    274
    240
    43
    Same.

    Read my historic posts, i actually got my dream girl in my bed on top of me kissing me in her underwear, thanks to all my self development etc, but i had been pmo'ing regularly still and couldn't do the job.

    Not gonna ever let that happen again
     
    Fork2323 likes this.
  4. Endlessknight

    Endlessknight Fapstronaut

    52
    35
    18
    I actually think there should be a separate area for the over 30 crowd. I can't relate to kids on here and I'm sure they can't relate to me.
     
  5. eom

    eom Fapstronaut

    8
    6
    3
    Hey man, I've been in the same boat. It gets frustrating and I honestly felt bummed and lacked confidence. It gets better just grind and focus on the goal.
     
  6. The Wrestler

    The Wrestler Fapstronaut

    697
    673
    93
    Looks like you'll actually have to get to know her! Shucks, right?
     
    Slothman likes this.
  7. Jesb

    Jesb Fapstronaut

    62
    60
    28
    One redeeming thing about still meeting up with girls is At least I can still makeout with these girls and eat their pussy. God knows how much I like to give oral to girls.
     
  8. CSLewis_YBOP

    CSLewis_YBOP Fapstronaut

    66
    109
    33
    There is. Check the Reboot Logs. They're listed by age group. So, I'm assuming you're in the 30-39 group. Lots of journals by men in that age group.
     
  9. The Wrestler

    The Wrestler Fapstronaut

    697
    673
    93
    Oh crap I'M in the over-thirty crowd...I am not going to get used to this.
     
    Fork2323 likes this.
  10. Endlessknight

    Endlessknight Fapstronaut

    52
    35
    18
    Personal logs/journals is not the same as an open topic forum.
     
  11. Infern0

    Infern0 Fapstronaut

    274
    240
    43
    maybe you should try to relate to people of all ages. it's a common problem amongst addicts not being able to relate to anyone.

    Everyone on here is going through the same thing, to differing degrees. There is always common ground.
     
  12. Endlessknight

    Endlessknight Fapstronaut

    52
    35
    18
    I guess but I read the post on here and most of them seem like they were written by a overly melodramatic teen. Sorry can't relate at my age.

    Another thing that bothers me is how liberal the word "addict" is thrown around. I haven't had the slightly issue given up porn. In fact I'm rather enjoying the return of my libido that abstinence has given me. It's beene 3 weeks and I'm committed to 90 days without porn, don't think it'll be even slightly an issues (But MO might be)
     
    Fork2323 likes this.
  13. Drew140

    Drew140 Guest

    I feel backed up
     
  14. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    2,007
    3,391
    143
    So you were never a melodramatic teen? I think everyone was at some point in their lives no? I'm a 40 year old female SO but I find that I can relate to almost everyone on here in some way. The insecurities and inexperience of being that age I've been there. And everything did feel like it was the end of the world. Why? Because I had no other life experiences to know that things did get better. I think as older more experienced adults we can impart our knowledge and life experiences on them. Not everyone is blessed with an older person to learn from. Many men grow up with no male role model or they don't feel comfortable talking to one they have.
    As for addicts definition just because you have no issue stopping for periods of time it does not mean you are not an addict. Look at it like the pmo was causing something negative in your life and you need to stop it. Whether you call that an addict or not really does not change much. And the flatline will pass you have to stick it out.
     
    LivinginRecovery and Slothman like this.
  15. Slothman

    Slothman Fapstronaut

    This:
    I've always felt like this forum's motive was to help ourselves. I've talked to girls, 50y/o dudes and 16 y/o teens here and yeah we can't probably relate but that doesn't mean we cannot share an encouraging word or phrase to let them know that they do have the strength to complete their goals, to change their lives.
     
  16. Endlessknight

    Endlessknight Fapstronaut

    52
    35
    18
    Yes of course I was at one time a melodramatic teen but that doesn't change the fact that the issues I face at my age in relation to nofap have very little to do with the issues they face.

    And what I'm experiencing doesn't even come close to the technical definition of addiction. I view porn the same way I few alcohol. Just because you occasionally enjoy a drink doesn't make you an alcoholic. The only reason I used porn as much as I did because I wasn't aware of the consequences. It was free, highly enjoyable and, at least at the time, seemed harmlless. Now that I am aware of the harm it does it's been extremely easy to stop. None of the compulsions and cravings that are associated with addiction.

    In fact it's been a down right pleasant experience. My sex drive has doubled, women seem so much more attractive. Feel 15 years younger. Wish I had did his much sooner.
     
    LivinginRecovery likes this.
  17. Don't be frustrated. Think positive
     
  18. gonna-fix-this

    gonna-fix-this Fapstronaut

    18
    21
    3
    Wow.. you are telling my story too. I had that complete disaster which was so brutal and so embarrassing. I've just met a nice girl at the weekend. I'm well ahead of myself but I have the same dread as you.
     
  19. Jesb

    Jesb Fapstronaut

    62
    60
    28
    These frustrations are affecting my pick up game. The other day I told a la senza associate not in the exact words that I want to bang her. Not even trying with girls lately. I'm emotionally fucked from previous these recent fails in bed. I don't even know how to continue on.
     
  20. Blackest Bile

    Blackest Bile Fapstronaut

    19
    228
    28
    I mean, we can all relate in our own way. Kids or not. Not being able to do the job in bed sucks for real... Even if you are 90 or 18...
     

Share This Page