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Yup, I'm an addict, and I don't know where else to go for help

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Jseppi, Jun 8, 2017.

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  1. Jseppi

    Jseppi Fapstronaut

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    Hey team.
    I am a 27 year old male who is currently married, has two kids, is going to grad school, and who is very addicted to porn. I got started when I was 11 and have used it all through my life to deal with the stress of being a teenager, strained relationships, hard life choices, and any other situation that made me uncomfortable. It was something I could control when life seemed out of control. I've always known that it wasn't necessarily a healthy habit, but recently I've discovered some of the effects it has on my life. For one, I can't get it up any more when I want to be intimate with my wife. I always have to ask for "help", and even then it goes away quickly if I'm not running through porn in my mind. I mean i'm not even 30 years old, this isn't a problem I should be having. I've also been getting to work late due to wanting to rub one out before I leave the house, but it takes longer than I plan due to the ED. I don't have anyone I can talk to about my addiction. My wife knows I have a problem, but every time I tell her that I'm struggling or that I've relapsed it creates so much strain between us that it makes honesty not worth it. I contacted a crisis line today when I was having some dark thoughts, and they pointed me to this website. I'm not going to say that this website is my last hope, but I will say that I hope it is the help I need to FINALLY quit this shit.
     
  2. TimeForAChange

    TimeForAChange Fapstronaut

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    Welcome!
    I've been here 2 days and I'm quite happy with this place
    Any questions or concerns, just ask on the forum
     
  3. ParvusSapentia

    ParvusSapentia Fapstronaut

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    We all struggle. Try reading as much as you can here and check out yourbrainonporn.com. Try a reboot and get yourself a therapist, and fight with us all. Your family is worth it and so are you.
     
  4. Jseppi

    Jseppi Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for your encouraging words. I haven't heard someone tell me I am worth anything in a long time. Even though you don't know me personally, what you said reminded me that even when we are at the lowest we have more worth than we know.
     
    ParvusSapentia likes this.
  5. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    Welcome to NoFap where you are amongst friends who are here to encourage you and sometimes challenge you but not judge you.

    The enemy is here to steal, kill and destroy. What are your current strategies for combating the enemy called PMO?
     
  6. Jseppi

    Jseppi Fapstronaut

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    I try to keep myself distracted, but I am also making sure to not trade one habit for another. I have found posting/reading on this website to be really helpful, and will keep doing that. I'm going to work on honesty with those I care about, and am trying to identify my triggers so I can avoid/counter them. I'm also trying to accept that I'm the kind of guy who looks at porn, but also the kind of guy who has enough strength and worth to live without it (this is going to be the first major step, I think).
     
  7. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

  8. i_wanna_get_better1

    i_wanna_get_better1 Fapstronaut

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    Welcome to the forum. I had my problem for decades and didn't make any progress until I started treating it as an addiction. It is impossible to be happily married with this problem. Identify your triggers, develop a toolbox of new coping skills and distraction methods, journal, and find an Accountability Partner. These are good things to do to get started. I wish you success on your journey.
     
    Jseppi likes this.

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