Hi guys! I've noticed that I fall every 9 days. The last time - "only" fantasies, but "heavy" enough to be treated as porn. Is this somehow scientifically explained? Or maybe it is spiritual stuff?
Fantasies without porn do not count as a relapse, unless you are specifically fantasizing about using porn. This is according to Your Brain on Porn.
Ok, set my counter back to the old date already. Well, those fantasies made me cum while sleeping. And I felt it and woke up. But still: why 9 days?
Possible you got an anxious block in your mind. You expect to fail at 9 days, so it becomes self fulfilling. Make it to ten. Refuse to accept 9. Tell yourself on day 9, "It doesn't matter what happens tomorrow. Today, I am going to break the cycle, and no matter what, I am not going to fall today." If you need to, get out your Patrick Stewart accent, and say, "The line must be drawn, here!" You know, now that I watch that quote, it really works for recovery. Putting that in my bank of resources.
I don't think so. When trying to stop using porn, It's important to be able to recognize what is and isn't porn. If you think everything is a relapse, even when it's not, then you will not make any progress. I think porn is using some artificial media like a computer, or book, or magazine, or telephone, as a means to get off. If you something happens involuntarily, like you dream about something, or you accidentally see a nude picture, that cannot be considered a relapse. Part of recovery is learning how to bump into those inadvertent situations and be able to resist falling back into your old compulsive behavior.
Thanks for your reassurance, the problem is my wet dream is always revolved around me watching porn other than having sex with women, even it's not a relapse, I'm afraid it's problematic to say the least.
I used to go 8 or nine days, but now I am down to about every three days. I hope you don't back slide. maybe aim to go 14 days? that should be do able. I did it the first time around, got to ninty days one time. never again, now I am working on it again.