Hello I am 16 years old and i started watching porn at 11 and the first porn I saw was gay porn i don't know why but after 2 days i found out straight porn and I continued with that , i am addicted to porn and masturbation , i masturbated like everyday but only on straight porn , i haven't masturbated on gay porn from 5 years and i started watching it now to test myself i am scared that I am gay , before i started watching more and more weird porn movies like , transwomen , futanari , etc and i liked it a lot , i liked to see big penises but now recently i only masturbated on lesbian porn , i have a girlfriend that i love and all my life I was into girls , i never ever had a crush on a boy or something like that , only on girls , i liked my girlfriend's vagina and i loved it , and we had many sex games that i enjoyed to the maximum , i don't find guys attractive , i nevet did but from some days i am worried about my sexuality and i keep testing myself ,I keep watching gay porn to see if i am getting aroused and I try everything to test myself , i never had a dream abour having sex with boys only with girls and at a time I started to like to selfsuck myself (i can do it) but I stopped because after a time it strated to be gross ,now if iI would have been gay I would have known that and I would have had crushes in boys I think , i worked out at the gym 8 months and I saw everyday half naked guys and had 0 attraction but now i don't know if it is HOCD because i was sometime scared that i will be sick from something and die , i was scared and stressed with that 3 months , maybe its ocd but i just want to.know if i quit porn for good i will stop having these gay thoughts that I have and i see that I am all the time aroused i don't know why , I am aroused by man anf woman , i don't know if it is arousal but a kind of , and gay porn now turns me off honestly and I lose my erection to it , but i don't know what is happening with me , cand somebody assure me that I am straight please ? It would make my life much better
Sounds like you have some issues. I can relate to you on a few of those behaviors but not all. Look, it's hard. Addiction really screws with you and gets you thinking all kinds of things about yourself that may or may not be true. I used to be repulsed by gay porn. Now, I can - or could, I should say, since I'm on NoFap - watch it with pretty much zero reaction, although I can't say I'm not sexually interested IN ANY WAY. That's what over-reliance on this stuff does to you. If you're gay, that's fine. Nothing to be ashamed of. If you're not - I don't think you are - then adjust your lifestyle. I think you simply need to cleanse yourself of these activities. Easier said than done but it'll clear your mind so you can start objectively figuring out your priorities. Stay strong.
Hi I am sorry you are going trough such a confusing stage in your life. First of all, I must say that I, or anyone in here, would not be able to tell you your sexuality, only you can do that. Having said that, I do see it as unlikely that you are (at least exclusively) attracted to men given the arguments you exposed. I believe the best way to go about it is to take the complete NoFap journey and refrain from PMO, as this is the only way your mind will be clear enough to, some time down the road, be able to determine what you actually feel and towards who. If at the end of this you determine that you are straight, gay or bisexual, you will be happy to know that you did all this to be able to experience your sexuality freely, confidently and without reservations. Best of luck! If there is anything you need don't hesitate to always ask
