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Porn use replacing partner

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by Hopefulgirl, Nov 16, 2017.

  1. Hopefulgirl

    Hopefulgirl Fapstronaut

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    I am curious as to what extent your P use replaced sexual intimacy with your SO. In my case, my partner refused sex with me for 2 years (well except 2 very mechanical and terrible times). Curious about if this happened to any extent in other relationships.....
     
    STAR DUST likes this.
  2. Zippal

    Zippal Fapstronaut

    In my case, it did not replace sex fully, more I would say it spoiled it, because most of time she has to make a step to have sex and also I act most of time selfish in sex or was too fast on her like less and less foreplay.
     
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  3. JesperMcnei

    JesperMcnei Fapstronaut

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    In my relationship P and M made me not get it up even though I wanted to have sex, and amny times I wasn't in the mood either. we mabye had sex once a month at most. I didn't realize this was a problem at the time because I just thought I wasn't in the mood and considered if I had ED. Not until much later (about 3 years maybe) did I find out that porn addiction was a thing and I probably had PIED.
     
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  4. TryingToHeal

    TryingToHeal Fapstronaut

    It didn't fully replace it, but it was much less frequent. He had changed shifts at work when all this started, so I thought that was why and didn't question it at much. Then, instead of him putting any effort into it, like he did before, it was literally like, "Do you want to have sex?". Like... yeah that's romantic. But anyway, yeah it got weird. And then what he wanted to do changed. He got focused on things he was never focused on before, like to the point where I felt like I had to do it (he didn't actually force me but I felt like if I didn't, he wouldn't enjoy himself at all and he was going to keep trying to I was just like ok whatever at some point even though I didn't want to). Even less emotionally connected and he was in a bad mood a lot. So, it really messed it up, but didn't stop it all together.
     
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  5. In my case, P didn't replace Love making with my wife at all! We had the same frequency as always.
    But in the last six months, I gradually experienced having trouble to stay hard during Love making, which was growing until I could not stay hard at all (My Ground Zero Day).
    I started my P & M Free journey then. And after three weeks of My Ground Zero Day, our Love making frequency got back to our normal, except that I like it and feel it a lot more!!
     
    Newlers, JesperMcnei and Hopefulgirl like this.
  6. Hopefulgirl

    Hopefulgirl Fapstronaut

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    Totally understood!
    My husband would say "Want to do it?"....
    After hearing this a few times I started replying "with who?".....
     
  7. bike-wrench

    bike-wrench Fapstronaut

    PMO totally replaced sex with my wife, to the point that I found ways to actively avoid sex with my wife. I have PIED, and I didn't want to even try, knowing we (especially she) would be disappointed, and then the issue of my PMO use might come up (that counter down there isn't recording the FIRST time I had this much time...)
     
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  8. osmowife

    osmowife Fapstronaut

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    My Husband's addiction caused a combination of these two things on us. Porn replaced me because "it's easier." He has said that during one of our more emotional/heated talks.
    When we did have sex he was so unenthusiastic to say the least.
     
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  9. Hopefulgirl

    Hopefulgirl Fapstronaut

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    My husband also said he did it because it was "easier" and an "escape"- so devaluing hey?
     
    bewildered2 likes this.
  10. STAR DUST

    STAR DUST Fapstronaut

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    ITS A RAP BRO SORRY. TRY TANTRA TO GET HER INTO IT.
     
  11. STAR DUST

    STAR DUST Fapstronaut

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    REALY WOW SINCE I HAVE ERADICATED PORN MY WIFE AND I'S BONDING EXPERIENCES ARE MAGICAL. GET RID OF THE PORN BECAUSE YOUR WIFE IS WORT IT. SORRY TO HEAR THAT ABOUT YOUR HUSBAND.
     
    Hopefulgirl likes this.
  12. Hopefulgirl

    Hopefulgirl Fapstronaut

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    I dont understand what you mean (and I am a woman) :)
     
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  13. STAR DUST

    STAR DUST Fapstronaut

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    Oh my God. I'm am so sorry. I have never heard of a girl going through such a thing. A woman deserves to be desired by the man she loves! Since I purified the widows of my soul I have a unquenchable longing for my wife. She is so amazing. How do you feel about it. Please. Describe your pain.
     
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  14. STAR DUST

    STAR DUST Fapstronaut

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    O
    H I got mixed up I sent the real you a message.
     
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  15. Hopefulgirl

    Hopefulgirl Fapstronaut

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    I see no message?
     
  16. STAR DUST

    STAR DUST Fapstronaut

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    Oh my God. I'm am so sorry. I have never heard of a girl going through such a thing. A woman deserves to be desired by the man she loves! Since I purified the widows of my soul I have a unquenchable longing for my wife. She is so amazing. How do you feel about it. Please. Describe your pain anger or hurt.
     
  17. Hopefulgirl

    Hopefulgirl Fapstronaut

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    You are very kind. Well, my husband and I have had periods of great sex, but there were periods of 2-3 months where he avoided it. I just thought it was stress and his long periods from home working etc. Then he hurt me during sex oe time(wouldnt stop when I asksd him to which is so bizarre for him), and he wouldnt have sex with me for 2 years. I tried, but he always rejected me (too tired, busy etc). I even took him to the doctor to have his hormone levels tested and seriously was starting to wonder if he was homosexual. He started looking at me like I was unnattractive and my self esteem plummeted. I questioned P use about 30 times, but he always denied it. I sent him emails with links to articles about the dangers of P use. He told me he had no desire. He did though, just not for me. He was PMO ing 5 times a week, sometimes twice a day.
     
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  18. STAR DUST

    STAR DUST Fapstronaut

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    just know that you are valuable
     
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  19. STAR DUST

    STAR DUST Fapstronaut

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    wow is there anything else.
     
  20. Hopefulgirl

    Hopefulgirl Fapstronaut

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    Just that it has been devastating.
     

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