Quitting after 15 years (My first post!)

Hi,

I am James, and I am quitting masturbation after about 15 years of excessive use.
I quit on January 7 2018. The day before that, like most days, I beat my meat 4 times in a row. My mind was clouded, low self confidence, no social contact. My life was wasting away in front of a monitor. Most of all, I had depleted my dopamine receptors so much, that my entire life seemed dull and awful... except the orgasms of course.
I lived 15 out of my 28 years with excessive PMO every single day. Through this I went to middle school, high school, got my college degree, and got great jobs in the field. But all the while, practically no social contacts, and never even a date. Now I dropped the habit, thanks to my newly acquired knowledge from places like this forum. I am on day 4 of my streak today, and feel it in my blood that I will never fail. I know it today, written in stone.
How can I be so confident? Thanks to people like you who have posted here, I read and learn, and for the first time, I know what to expect of my enemy. I am prepared for Battle, I see my future, and I am ready. I now understand the science behind my addiction. I know the battle plan of the enemy, and for that reason it stands no chance. And more importantly, I have been able to accurately define myself as an addict which needs recovery.

I will now need to re-define myself, and what my life means outside of masturbation. It will be a version of me that has never existed. A version of me that I will need to build day by day. For now I am on a painful sort of withdrawal autopilot, where I simply go day by day, not even thinking about porn, not even imagining any hot babes. It's almost like a trance state, where I am going to work everyday, but I feel tired, and have no idea what to do with myself.

To help distract, I try hobby stuff, but nothing keeps me engaged. Everything is just so dull and boring, making withdrawal terrible. But since I know this is due to my depleted dopamine sensitivity, I hold strong, and never fail.

While I am in withdrawal, it's like I'm an astronaut. Out in the cold vacuum away from the sick stuff that I most love, the stuff that defines me at a core level. But like an astronaut who looks back at earth and sees the big picture, I too have been able to look back upon my life from this far out perspective... and for the first time, I see the flaws in my ways, and I see the solution. The view is so clear out here, I can see the past, the present, and the future. I see myself being free of this demon, having a beautiful girlfriend, and unleashing the alpha within.

Looking forward to the journey, and thanks to all who share and make our success possible.

Thanks,
James

 

Thanks t-jam!

 

Thanks D.J! One of my greatest strategies is to use nofap.com as my main weapon. nofap offers me many power weapons for my battle. Weapons given to me by nofap.com (by members like you who are kind enough to post their knowledge) include experience, coping tactics, comradeship, and intense detail on what to expect during withdrawal. This allows me to push through the pain, knowing that it is normal, and knowing that there are benefits.

I read hundreds of stories of success, of failure, and of the day by day grind of the journey. This powerful wealth of knowledge seals in my victory. And I also admit, the panic button is an awesome tool. Now the time I spent looking at porn, is spent reading about how to avoid it.

And most off all, now that I have lifted the cloud of masturbation from my mind, I can open myself to improving other aspects of my life which I have neglected.

Sincere thanks for the interest and the support.

James

 

Thank you RunningFree! Yes, it is a day by struggle, but thanks to people like you who have shared their experience, I feel that my success is guaranteed.

 

Thanks ClearAsMud!

 

Thanks StopTheMusic! I Agree, community is key.

 

Thank You StopTheMusic! Will Do!

 

Posting on those profiles was a great experience! Thank you StopTheMusic for helping jump start me in the community. It means Allot!