Thirty days down. One day at a time. Life is good. It has been over three months since I last had a streak long enough to post here. And I have learned so much in those three months. My life has been revelation upon epiphany, one after another. 1. This This post has been extremely challenging and helpful. You should read it. https://yourbrainonporn.com/my-thoughts-rebooting-extremely-long-post 2. Porn Doesn't Ruin Your Life; Porn is a Symptom of Your Life It's harsh, but it's true. I have only started truly recovering since I realized this. It is a total shift of the paradigm. You should not be here to save your life from porn. You should be here to recover the life you want to live, and porn has no place in that life. 3. Abstinence is not Recovery You can go without PMO for a hundred days or a thousand days and still not be recovering. Recovery involves a complete change of mind and lifestyle. Who do you want to be? Does that person watch porn? Then become who you wish to be, and abstinence will come naturally. 4. Numbers are Only Numbers I have always been attached to my streak. I liked having large numbers, even if it meant not admitting when I had failed. The number of days on your day counter is irrelevant. Are you healing? Are you recovering? That's what's important. 5. Relapse is Not Failure Every time you build a long streak, you learn something. Your progress need not be lost when you relapse. Cheers, - Sunshadow
Your ideas greatly resonate my thinking but I would just like to point out that, abstinence is part of the recovery and not recovery itself. Urges do come and they can sometimes get unpredictable and I find myself not strong enough to resist. Being strong here will be pretending to be someone I am not, which in no way will be recovering. But I can think that I have to just get past the threshold in the hope of better future. Hope is a good thing my friend. It can provide direction to the clueless. Though I would agree that at some point (probably 15-20 days into nofap), abstinence cannot remain the goal but it's still part of the process.
These are wise, wise words, and they articulate thoughts I've had but haven't been able to write down. Congratulations to you on 30 days. Here's to many more, and a fulfilling life.
