Instagram, social media shutdown?

One of the more perverse things I have done that I am completely ashamed of was checking Facebook religiously for posts by my female friends. I am a 'mature aged student', and as such, many of my Uni friends are at least a decade or so younger than me. As a 34 year old, this puts a lot of them between 17-24.
Young women around this age tend to post photos of themselves and their friends having fun at the beach, by the pool, or anywhere else where it's suitable to be wearing very little.
I know these girls in real life. I see them almost daily in one class or another. One of the worst feelings of guilt and shame I've ever experienced was meeting them Monday morning for class, having not even half an hour before, masturbated and climaxed over pictures of them bikini clad from their fun and innocent time out over the weekend. Looking them in the eye knowing that virtually minutes before I had my dick in my hand lusting all over their pictures.

One of the best things I have ever done was to restrict what I regularly see on Facebook. I haven't closed my account as I use the messaging system to contact my friends and family, but an alternative is the use of the 'unfollow' option. This way I remain friends with them for chatting purposes, but I do not see any of their posts on my wall, and most importantly, any of their pictures. As a result, my lusting for them has been completely solved, and there is no longer any need to feel shame when seeing them in person.

If people are thinking that the deletion of social media would be a good idea, but don't want to sacrifice the genuine desire to use it for the platform it was designed to be, look in to the alternative options that still allow you to use the service without the distractions.

 

Welcome! I'm glad you're here!

The only social media I subscribe to -- unless this site counts -- is Facebook. I have, in the past, searched Facebook for content that is suggestive, but thankfully, I have avoided that for many months.

If I couldn't use Facebook without it causing problems, I would quit it. But then, I haven't faced that choice yet; I hope I would see my resolve through.

I hope you keep coming back!

 

Is it possible that a man can lie to his SO about abusing Facebook and Instagram for this? I did catch him checking out a few girl's profiles a year ago and even liking girls picture whom he used to like. He has since unfriended them and unfollowed, but one of the girls is still on his list. He denies it. If he has struggled with telling the truth and PMO, can he be lying? How to trust?

 

Hey @discogene ,

Yes. Hopefully forever, not just for the reboot.

I'm just a normal ordinary member. No moderator super powers and no special insite. I share my ESH (Experience, Strength and Hope) of what works for me.

Just another warm welcome and a heart felt hello. This community has helped me so much.

What worked for me was "working" it. It took hard work for me to complete a hard reboot (No pmo) for 120 days, then move into a Sex Positive mode.

First, reading the literature published by NoFap itself along with reading journals.

Then, doing the work. Writing in my journal and replying to introductions and other's journals.

Finally, but not least, getting involved with the fellowship. I found it on the forums, but also in people's profiles. The forums tend to be longer posts, where the profiles tend to be more "conversational".

That is what has worked for me. I like to remind myself that this community was here waiting for me with the lights on when I arrived. Now, I have to do my best to be there when someone comes to the community.

--> L

PS:

One of the ways I got involved with the fellowship was by reading some really great journals. Reading other's stories with their victories and even defeats is a big part of my program.

Once you open a journal, click "Watch Thread" in the upper right of the page to get alerts when new posts are made. Here are just a few:

@Iron Patience - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/155794/
---
@ludwig525 - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/155658/
---
@Dragonnlife - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/136148/
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@weddingnails - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/155372/

There are many more, and you can discover them on your own. But, these are great places to start.

 

Well I guess my first question is, "Does he actually still have her as a contact?"
If no, then there is little reason to distrust his intentions to try and regain any lost trust, or any sincere attempts at asking for forgiveness. Giving forgiveness is a lot harder than asking for it, sure, but he is only human, and humans fail. A lot. He is probably (undoubtedly) feeling a lot of shame surrounding these issues, particularly if you have already voiced your concerns. My advice is to confront him about it. But talk to him civilly rather than making any demands. Let him know that you are worried about trust issues, and work together to resolve them for the benefit of you both.

If, however, he has lied about deleting his contact, I would suggest being a little more stern with your concerns. Again, communication is vital in this (and every) situation, but still do not resort to any form of demands, or get overly angry. Of course you can be angry at his deceit, but I know from experience that overtly showing it aggressively puts the opposing party on the defensive, and they will be unwilling to discuss anything further.

Restrained compassion are my words of advice here.

 

I stopped going to Instagram explore page because is full of prevertive stuff

 

Same here. I also unfollowed all the models/ gram girls/ hot acquaintances from it because it was just too much temptation.