Hey my name ist Jeep and I'm 23 years old, and I have been struggling with pornography for quite some time (roughly 10 years) now.. Currently I'm in a happy relationship and engaged. My girlfriend knows all about my addiction and supports me the best possible way. My problem is that I rather spend time looking at porn than doing stuff and every time I try to hold it back, I become sexually frustrated. The fact that we won't sleep with each other until marriage (I'm no longer a virgin, but when we dated, we decided that we both wanted it that way) or touch each other doesn't help at all. Which is why, that often at night I look at porn and ejaculate to it, because else I feel like going crazy. (Like around 10 minutes ago) and afterwards I feel like shit, because I kinda cheated on her again and I know that it is bad for me, but still do it. I hope that through sharing this with y'all, it can make a difference at maybe one day get of off this ship of pornography. Greetings
Here are some top tips: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/my-top-tips-for-leaving-pmo-behind.35201/
Welcome to NoFap where you are amongst friends who are here to encourage you and sometimes challenge you but not judge you. The enemy is here to steal, kill and destroy. What are your current strategies for combating the enemy called PMO?
Hey @ringojeep , I'm just a normal ordinary member. No moderator super powers and no special insite. I share my ESH (Experience, Strength and Hope) of what works for me. Just another warm welcome and a heart felt hello. This community has helped me so much. What worked for me was "working" it. It took hard work for me to complete a hard reboot (No pmo) for 120 days, then move into a Sex Positive mode. First, reading the literature published by NoFap itself along with reading journals. Then, doing the work. Writing in my journal and replying to introductions and other's journals. Finally, but not least, getting involved with the fellowship. I found it on the forums, but also in people's profiles. The forums tend to be longer posts, where the profiles tend to be more "conversational". That is what has worked for me. I like to remind myself that this community was here waiting for me with the lights on when I arrived. Now, I have to do my best to be there when someone comes to the community. * L PS: One of the ways I got involved with the fellowship was by reading some really great journals. I've included journals from all age groups, spiritual members, religious members, secular members, male and female. You should find journals that help. If not, look around, there are hundreds of others from which to choose. When I say "it works if you work it", reading journals is part of that work. Once you open a journal, click "Watch Thread" in the upper right of the page to get alerts when new posts are made. Here are just a few: @2525 Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/150280/ --- @Visor Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/144228/ --- @Dragonnlife Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/136148 --- @weddingnails Journals at: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/143418/ --- There are many more, and you can discover them on your own. But, these are great places to start. This is a work in progress. So, if a journal has changed or is no longer active, look around there are some amazing journals on here.
Just updating I guess. Thanks for all the reply's especially from #stopthemusic Since 2 weeks ago a lot happened and not in the positive way. I fapped regularly to all sorts of porn you name it, i probably seen it. On the other side to get my mind on different things, I watched movies, played games, but the most important things I didn't do.. I didn't study, I lied to my girl and I fear as soon as this post is sent, I will go back to porn, movies, or gaming tomorrow or in a couple days. For some reason, something inside my head, mind, won't change or put even worse or realistic, for some reason doesn't want to change. I'm still searching for that reset button, or at least button 1 of x... s I'll look at those journals you mentioned and hopefully from now on continue this journal on a regular basis. I know I'm not alone in this, I just need to realize it. Greetings Jeep
Hey, First, glad you came back and posted. It's not easy to kick any addiction and porn addiction is as hard as any. There is so much on NoFap that sometimes it's difficult to know where to start. I can only share my own experience. I try not to offer opinion or advice. After my first dozen tries at NoFap and relapsing every time (sometimes every day), I realized that the only way I'd succeed was to feel as if I belonged here. I needed to know in my heart that I could jump in and feel at home. So, I started. I replied, I chatted on profiles. I dug around and figured out that profiles are where the community posts "shares" (like emails) and profiles are quick one or two liners (like text). Most importantly, I felt like I just needed to "start". Start being a part. Not because someone extended a "job" or "task" to me, but rather me just doing what I could. I can't even begin to tell you what a good task for you would be, but I do know that getting a commitment helped me very much. * L
Hey, When I came back yesterday, I was proud about me, because I didn't think about porn fapping at all since tuesday and I wanted to write it here to inform about my progress. Instead I had one thought dwelled more deeply in it and eventually read a sex story, just words no pictures and came. I then cursed myself, but i did it again only a few hours later. This morning I woke up and the first thought I had was watching porn and masturbating. For some reason I did, even thoug, I knew the consequences, and yet it didn't help. So I'm at day 0 again back on track this time hopefully thanks goes out @StopTheMusic I read one journal already and got some good ideas from that, which I will look into deeper today. I'm happy that I'm not alone in this and that there are several others with the same struggle. Greetings Jeep
Journals are amazing. Some full of hope, some full of heartbreak followed by joy. Some a more "day to day" activities. But, all took time for someone to write and I like reading them. --> L
Last a whole two days back on day ZERO again, yet more excited to get back up. Took the idea from @Visor (Thanks a lot) with a weekly plan, hope that it will not only help me, but also get everything else, slowly back on track.
Day 0 Well I started my day sticking to the plan I made and I guess it worked quite well. In the morning I have classes, and the last lesson was hell. I always had pictures in my mind that kept me from concentrating and an inner me that wanted me to look at games (nsfw games). When I came home these urges grew bigger and I tried to pass them by looking at youtube videos instead which lead to me falling asleep. The rest of the was uneventful, I didn't get any work done and watched youtube videos all the time (always this voice in the back of my head look at games, you don't even have play! just look, see if there are any new updates) I really tried and felt the pain of not looking and a few minutes ago I failed. I didn't play any game, but I looked if there, are new ones out. I didn't masturbate at all today, which feels nice, but since I looked at the material, it is day 0 again for me. I hope I can be productive now for a little while and go to bed with more success tomorrow.
First days are terrible because you feel like you can't do anything else or you're missing something but it's just a matter of few days before you start to do things again. It happens to hit day 0 again but starting over again immediately is the correct spirit.
I hope you're right. Today out of nowhere arousing thoughts came to me and instead of, taking a cold shower, or going out I stuck to them and before I knew it played adult games and fapped to them. I'm at ground 0 again, and it sucks because either don't learn anything trying to keep my mind from thinking about these games or pictures, or on the other hand spend a lot of time over the day building up arousal which leads to a single touch and afterwards a powerful orgasm.
Hey man, how are you going? Trust me It's really a matter of being mindful and it is not an effortless process in particular on your first tries cause it requires you to change you habits. You have to suffer the discomfort from stopping a process in your mind that you actually like. Try to understand and keep in mind if and how much that pleasure affects your life. Me too after more than forty days! Actually I masturbated without pornografy. Don't worry it's a long way to the top (if you wanna do NoFap)
Day 3 Well, these last couple days where really filled with work and stress related amounts. A good thing I guess is, that my moved my laptop from my room to the library (Our dorm and college are connected) and with that I now am in a public place, which till now prohibits me from doing anything stupid. ^^ Earlier today and just a few minutes ago I thought about "just looking" at porn again, or in my case pornograhical games visual and text-based and actually read about updates from a few of these games. This afternoon I had a battle or more a discussion in my head like: 1: "come on, just playing one game to see what the new changes and features are isn't wrong. It doesn't hurt you at all!" 2: "I'm not sure, I shouldn't." 1: " You don't have to touch yourself, just look, afterwards you can relax far more." 2: "Maybe you are right.. Just look won't hurt" -opening one game via my mobile phone. Clicking that I'm over 18 and legally allowed to read/play. 1: "Yes there you go, lets find out, what is new." 2: "No this feels wrong, I shouldn't be here, I can't lie to the guys at NoFap and I would feel bad." - closing the site and putting my phone away. 1: "Oh come on!!!" Afterwards I slept for three hours, while waking up in between a few times, but I didn't go through with it, like I did the last few times. Just a few minutes ago, one of my fellow students went to bed, and due to that I'm now alone in the library and immediatly, I looked againg if there are any new updates. (I even was thinking about spending money to look at a game). I hereby have to say I like the panic button on this site, it helped/helps a lot. So till now it seems like everything is on its way. Thank you Guys for all the support and thanks @Protagoras for the useful tips, as soon as my tests are done, I'll look closer into those books you mentioned. Good night from this part of the world.
Great I'm not the very unique man that fights this kind of battles Yea, I can see you're moving your first steps Keep going, you're doing it right! Also I can see you're on your third day and I'm on my forth. I do formally dare you to discover who's the long lasting!
hahah yeea! Ok then, it'll be a 5 days offset to compare our progresses, I re-challenge you! Jokes apart, don't worry and just start again. Try to analyze the reasons why you did it that is the context that triggered you and the mind traps you strumbled into.
