Just relapsed again after one day and i feel that i really need help

Some background story
I have been masturbating since i was 5(prone masturbation). I would also actively seek out newspaper and magazines with lingerie ads. Discovered P around 10. Since then I have been PMOing for the last 10 years (I am 20 now). I mostly do it just once a day. Spending about 30mins to an hour. Very rarely i do it more than once to a maximum of 3 times.

Discovered NoFap around end of March, 2018. After reading more about NoFap, i decided to give it a try due to them describing some of the issues i have. Mainly i am bad at explaining things to people, extremely antisocial, extremely bad memory (oftenly I cant even remember what i do the previous day when people ask) and really bad focus.

I talked to my friends about this issue and some said to just PMO when you get urges. One think its not a problem if done in moderation. (He doesnt believe in the 90 days rebooting process and i really want to reach that goal)

Journey of NoFap and why I relapsed
Started NoFap 1st of April. Since then i have relapsed about 8-9 times. Longest streak was 14 days. Most of the time i relapse is due to urges, fantasizing and rationalizing. Fantasizing is the worst because i would be so distracted to do anything. Once i am tired of fighting i would just relapse. I talk to my friend and he said its because i am not really doing the things that i really want to do which i found it to be true. I am just doing the things that i have read that people are doing to transmute sexual energy. But that is also where the issue is.

I am not particularly motivated to do anything. I do not have a reason to do it, but i also do not have a reason not to do it.

This apply to NoFap as well. After reading up about NoFap, i know its causing me harm. But i am so helpless against it. After about 1 week urges and fantasizing begin for as long as i am awake. Tried doing other things but failed. For my previous streak (11 days), i dont know what changed but i was literally precumming every couple of minutes due to fantasizing which ultimately lead to a relapse. This did not happen on my previous 14 days streak.

I am really lost now. What should i be doing at this point?