Ashamed of being virgin

I know things might feel rough in your situation but the best advice I can give you is to focus on self-improvement and not caring about modern society's standards of what makes a happy, fulfilling and rich life.
As soon as you start improving yourself, becoming more confident and make things that are truly meaningful to you and puts you on a higher path in life, you will feel more balanced and content and that good and energetic vibe is going to be radiated and felt by most people around you (especially women).
That's when you also will be able to raise your standards and attract the type of woman that's right for you (and reject those who are bad) and who will like you and love you, regardless of your experience-level in the bedroom. I know it might sound cliché but most guys worry way too much about this issue (i.e. what their future woman-friend will think of you if she finds out about this).
If she's a good or great woman, she won't care about that at all. She will just feel great being around you.

 

Well it doesnt matter how good you are in bedroom. Whats important is that you want to satisfy girl and do everything for her to feel good. Not saying you have to go to extremes but if you wont care about her or wont want her feel good but put yourself first instead then she will most likely to be pushed away by that.

 

It doesn matter what others think about you. If everyones likes you then you are doing something wrong. You want to go with general public but thats mistake cause most people dont think. You have to find something you believe and live by that. In the end of the day only what you think about yourself matter.

 

I get what you are saying there. I always feel like a little voice in the back of my head that reminds me that everyone I know, friends, family, co-workers, have all had sex and I haven't. I don't think most people have that voice in their head. A good example for me is that I know for a fact that all my co-workers have sex because A) some have kids and B) They will occasionally talk about sex. In that regard I cannot relate and do not feel like "one of them".

 

I totally understand what you mean as I have been in that exact situation myself (for a few years actually). However, there are a few things I have learned from it and then later applied to overcome that feeling of stress and anxiety that our modern hyper-sexualized world tends to put on those who don't fit into that particular frame:

1) People tend to talk and exaggerate a lot in order to make their otherwise ordinary, stagnating and boring lives sound more exciting than they indeed might be. If they have nothing to come up with but sex-stories and such, there's a fair chance their lives are quite unsatisfying and dull overall.

2) Stop caring about what others do and focus on improving yourself instead, i.e. walk your own way and shove those distractions (your coworker and friends' private lives) aside. Not only will you save yourself lots of energy and anxiety but also feel better and more confident about yourself in the long run. A few things attract women more than a centered, confident man who thinks positively about himself, no matter what the people around him might say or do.

3) By not focusing so much on lust and sex, you will go quite far, although the worst urges are hard to overcome in the beginning. By Start spending time doing the things you are passionate about and that brings true meaning and fulfillment to your life, your urges for lust and sex will be in second or even third place after some time. The most famous and successful people in their respective fields do not have sex all day long (guaranteed), they focus on improving themselves and how they can benefit others.

4) Stop consuming the horrendous popular culture (Hollywood-movies, TV-series, stupid TV-shows, magazines, junk-food, pornography, excessive alcohol, etc) which won't do anything good for your body and mind. It has nothing to do with reality and its only purpose is to turn people into hollow-eyed, stupid and obedient consumers. Instead, start reading books and educating yourself about things that genuinely interest you.

5. Start meditating and engage in some kind of spiritual activities (alone or in group doesn't matter) which will strengthen your mind, body and soul in the long run. It will also make you feel cool, calm and very content about yourself in the long run and. That confident and energetic vibe will definitely be felt by all people you meet (especially women who are experts at deciphering non-verbal cues).

These five have all helped me a lot in the struggles you described above.

 

I am 24 going on 25 and also a complete virgin. The only thing I have ever done with a girl was make out with them (and even that has been few and far between); I have never had a blowjob, a handjob, been felt up, touched, or anything more sexual then just kissing. I feel like a circle in a world of squares and its fucking sucks. For so fucking long I was an emotional wreck because I didn't understand how I was still a virgin. I play professional guitar, i'm Italian, really good looking, an athlete, an artist, but I've never had sex. Every one else has had sex and already lost their virginity years ago but I haven't wtf?!?! I would just torture myself with this thought to NO END. I would incessantly beat myself up over it and blame stupid things like blame God or the universe or my parents or that I have some sort of disorder, or just that I am cursed, etc. But I only just realized that I am still a virgin because of one thing and one thing only: my fetish PMO addiction. Literally at the age of 24 I just realized this. I'm still a fucking virgin because since the age of 10 up until only recently I was just isolating in my room, watching the same fetish porn and masturbating; no wonder I've never had sex or sexual experience lol I physiologically rewired my brain not to want it. Only now am I begging to realize EXACTLY the root cause of all of this and just how bad my fetish PMO addiction desensitized and rewired my brain. For the past year, even with countless streaks and relapses, I am beginning to notice change. I haven't watched porn for over a month, havent masturbated for like 3 weeks and I am already starting to subtly see changes: I am able now get subtly aroused by NORMAL shit like just seeing a hot girl or guy and wanting to kiss them. So yea I COMPLETELY empathize with you and all I can say is nofap is the only way to lose your v-card.

 

It definitely hangs over my head from time to time (27 yo btw), I've had numerous occasions to do something about it but I think that my self-hatred prevented me from forming any kind of relationship. It's anxiety-inducing but I strongly feel that the thing that kept me away from making a connection is that self-loathing and fear of intimacy kinda thing.

You're not going to be happy unless you target those issues. Even if PMO is a problem for you, the underlying cause is still the low opinion of self etc.

 

Never be ashamed of being a virgin. It's your choice, your life, and your will. No one should put you down ever. Fuck them. You know, girls like guys who are virgins because to them..you chose them to have sex with. They feel this huge impression, responsibility, and gratitude for being your first man.

 

I was about to comment the same thing then saw @夜神月 's reply.

There is a saying that goes "If you're afraid to fall. You will fall, because you are afraid"
I always kept that phrase in my head when I used to practice parkour and free running.

Firstly, I lost my virginity at the age of 24, which was last year. Only because I changed my ways.
I used to say the same thing "Oh, I have no chance with girls. I will never have sex or enjoy it with a beautiful girl. Bla Bla Bla". I learned that as long as you are not a complete piece of shit and probably not the WORST looking stinky dude (which I am a 100% sure you are NOT), you have a chance with girls. Any girl.

You need to start believing in yourself man. Be confident. Look at what needs to be changed and change it. Start working out if you have to. Practice speaking to strangers if you're shy.
Girls are not hard to talk to. What's the worst that could happen? She says no. You move on.
If you believe in yourself, you will achieve anything.

 

You've gotta learn to embrace it, man. True, society will mock and shun you for it, but it should be a proud moment that you have put off any intimate acts to that point. I will be 30 by the end of the year, and I am one myself but remember there's a silver lining in everything.