Brand new

Hi, I am new to nofap. I will say that I have affected negatively by fapping since the first time I tapped. At the time I was very withdrawn from my classmates, had no social skills, and was in my adolescent head way to much. I discovered fapping and became obsessed (decades later I realize that was the beginning of active addiction) with it. Eventually I got into drugs, became a social butterfly, all the while my porn addiction progressively worsened. When I discovered cocaine, things got really crazy. Eventually I settled down with an amazing lady. But, my constant need for euphoria whether it be from sex, fapping, drinking, snorting coke and eventually smoking crack, destroyed our relationship and I chose chasing the dragon over the love and support of an amazing young lady. And years later I realized, the paradox is that what I gave up in her actually makes me feel better than the bullshit I chase to the gates of insanity. Anyway, after her and I broke up, I got into opiates and eventually IV drug usage. During this time, porn and fapping were not an issue. But, towards the end of my opiate addiction I picked up the crack cocaine and with that came lots of porn and tapping. So, I've been clean from drugs and alcohol since August 22, 2014. But in that time, my porn usage and dapoung has seemingly replaced the drugs. I'm coming up on 5 years clean and think it's time to break free of these shackles that porn and fapping have on me. I need support! Thank you all for being hear. I am open to any and all feedback