Nofap for saving life

I do nofap for 32 and Tmwhich i try to do That from 4 years. But what made me disapointment is the fear of microscopic tears due to peins enlargment exersise technique like pump.
Do you thick i have microscopic tears in my cc i dont know where is idea from the Internet come from but but That make me scary. Please help me.

 

No, one day in 2012 i feel Electric feeling in Pelvic floor and vents apear in shaft. And it become hard in flaccid state. Lower erection quality and numbness noted to and lost my spontenouse and morning erection.
I masterbate hard to test my erection and after i read about venouse leakage. I try Doppler ultasound two times
Frist one on sign of fibrosis or calcination but with mild venouse leakage. Doctor said may it psyclogical effect so try again
I try again no venouse leakage evey thing is fine
I am still have this ed due to pump and so called hard flaccid
I read about obotoi book hard flaccid revail That said That peins enlargment exersise cause hard flaccid as biological defence and may nofap training can reset my psyclogical defence
I hope so i will nofap intill Wet dreams come again my be i cure my ed by this way i hope so

 

Yeah i feel i lost evey thing. I can’t Work i can’t eat i can’t study. I dont know what happen to me is it mental or physical Injury. I do Doppler with many stange white spots or lyers doctor said it just the blood rooms in your cc. But may thire wall becom thick and didn't relax any more. Some one said your brain send signal to compress the smooth muscle. I have fear of transform my smooth muscle to fibrosis but no one said That from Doppler. Just i dont know any thing i feel like iam trab in maze

 

I want to store spontenouse erection
And mornig wood
Ability of genrate erection like my teenager time That before my sad ten years of ed