I am doing pretty well, happy with the progress so far and have stayed far away from the type of porn that was most problematic for me. About a month ago I realised it was best to steer clear of all electronic images, even those which I would have once considered harmless such has cam girls and sexual images in general. The upshot is that I was walking around, head held high, absolutely no sleaziness in my life. Nice. The other day, for whatever reason, I had a little perve online; nothing too hectic, not even anything nude. Time spent looking was less than five minutes before realising I was feeding the monster within, coming to my senses and then getting on with my day. That evening at the mall and for the next day or two I have found myself looking at women in an unhealthy way again. Just checking them out like they were meat for my pleasure. Realised what I was doing and felt sleazy. Not nice. Don't know what will happen over time but it is clear to me that staying on the straight and narrow path is important while curing the PMO addiction. Whilst on this happy journey clearly any P is bad P.
You're right. When I have done complete monk mode (no artificial sexual stimulation AT ALL) your brain changes quiet quickly. but if you keep peeking at stars or pictures or social media pages, it fires up the old neuro pathways and makes you crave that rush again. It's awful how easy access this stuff is.
I once relapsed when I was just 56 day because of youtube . There was some video about a girl that gave me urges.When I got urges some how my brain goes in autopilot mode and seeks for stimulation on internet without realizing it . The more you fell in this hole of stimulation even if it is girls in bikini you will eventually end up at rock bottom.
That's right it will escalate eventually to porn. It takes really strong willpower to break this cycle .
I need will power on steroids...... like seriously...... even simple bikini photos are triggering me !!
You are spot on with your analogy. Once you let sexual imagines back into your brain they will overpower you in the end and you will be back at square one in no time. I tell myself i cannot tempt myself sexually in anyway if i want to stay PMO free. If i tempt myself by simply looking at girls in underwear in a Target catalogue then as you put it the monster will awaken and once it's up it always wins in the end. A little perve online as you describe it will end up being a large perve online so keep clear and keep that monster sound asleep. Good-luck.
I believe I your perspective. But why is it so bad too look at a catalogue from target. Women are a beautiful creation. They grab a mans eye because they are so beautiful. It a mans nature to look at a woman. How do you ever meet a girl if your not aloud to look?..