Need some help, close to breaking.

I am very close to breaking have broken my no porn streak and trying to keep my no PMO streak going. Urges have been driving me crazy and I work in an office so on my own computer in my own office. The urges are louder than they have ever been. It is like a voice inside that is screaming and I just want to bash my head into a wall to make it stop, not actually going to do that though. Typing on here definitely helps, anyone got any words or encouragement. I need them not and will give back to the community in kind as well.

 

Thank you guys didn't break but my no p counter is now at zero, oh well back on the horse again. My no pmo or mo is still strong but was afraid it wasn't going to be. I have never worked so hard to not do something.

 

I did fall off the horse again, once I saw porn I couldn't get it out of my mind. All kinds of images and things my cravings wanted to search more took over. Once I relapsed I didn't do it again and I am going strong right now. GodMyWitness I will read that book today thank you for giving me a link to it. Thank you all for the support I won't let you down today, I will go one day at a time.

 

The day before yesterday was really difficult but I was able to pull through. I found one of my old phones and looked through it. Looked through some old websites that I visited and looked at porn but then turned it off. I told myself a lie and that that shouldn't count against me. So my cravings had already found a way in. I went to sleep and the next day my cravings told me that we can probably look and just not say anything, I'm sure everyone has been there. And unfortunately I bought into the lie. I kept trying to stop yesterday, watching then turning it off then watching again and turning it off until I caved.

 

Thank you all and I need to be aware when my mind says just looking won't hurt because I know that isn't me saying that. @FreedomFlight I do like my job but it can be stressful and throughout my life I had porn to turn to when I was stressed. So breaking that and facing the stress with knowing that it is just something everyone in life deals with is what I need to keep in my head. I know if it wasn't for porn my life would be better in so many areas.