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Finally ready to stop

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by NTC1996, May 29, 2020.

  1. May 29, 2020 #1
    NTC1996

    NTC1996 New Fapstronaut

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    It's day 0 and I'm a 46 yr-old man who's used porn since college. I've known for several years that I am addicted to porn. I've been really close to admitting it to a couple of close friends, but I never have. Lately, I've thought a lot about how much I need to fix this problem before it causes bigger problems or lasting damage to people I really care about. Most of the time, PMO is a way to relieve stress or because I was bored. I also think it's been a way to procrastinate or avoid dealing with something. This morning, while looking through some porn subreddits, I came upon the nofap subreddit, read a few posts, and I've been reading most of the day, off and on. I think I can change, I've stopped using porn before for several weeks and even months at a time. I really want it gone forever. It wasn't until 24 years of marriage that my wife asked if I ever looked at porn and I didn't say no, but I didn't go into the full extent of my habit either. It would break my heart if she thought it was because I preferred anyone else over her. I've decided to try PM instead of PMO because I'm not sure I could completely abstain.
     
    NTC1996, May 29, 2020
    NTC1996, May 29, 2020
    #1
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  2. May 29, 2020 #2
    anaturalsatori

    anaturalsatori Fapstronaut

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    Welcome @NTC1996. I too have had my wife ask about PMO and I couldn't answer with confidence. I felt weak and afraid and ashamed. I don't want to have to answer like that again, but I also don't want to feel like a loved one thinks it's them and not me. So I too have taken on this journey. Sadly my marriage is on the chopping block right now, but I want to come out as a better person either way. I'm tired of feeling like I have something to hide while being tired of having a crutch to rely on like PMO. You mentioning stress makes me think of myself. "It's just to help me sleep at night" is what I would think. After reading your post, I'm more inspired to keep going on my Nofap journey. I want to feel the stress. I want to embrace the stress, stare it in the face and deal with it. It sounds like you have that feeling too. Thanks for your post.
     
    anaturalsatori, May 29, 2020
    anaturalsatori, May 29, 2020
    #2
    NTC1996 likes this.
  3. May 29, 2020 #3
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    You can! Have you read any books about addiction to porn? My favorite is Breaking the Cycle by George Collins. There are many good general addiction books as well. My favorite at the moment is Rational Recovery by Jack Trimpey. Best of luck.

    Also I almost forgot the "SPAM REMOVED (spam code #001) - REPORT TO MODERATION": https://SPAM REMOVED (spam code #00...D (spam code #001) - REPORT TO MODERATION.pdf
     
    Deleted Account, May 29, 2020
    Deleted Account, May 29, 2020
    #3
    NTC1996 and anaturalsatori like this.
  4. May 30, 2020 #4
    One Eyed Owl

    One Eyed Owl Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    Welcome to NoFap!!!
     
    One Eyed Owl, May 30, 2020
    One Eyed Owl, May 30, 2020
    #4
  5. May 30, 2020 #5
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Hi @NTC1996, all the best to you! If you want to join 'The Matrix' challenge click here ---> 'The Matrix' <---
     
    Deleted Account, May 30, 2020
    Deleted Account, May 30, 2020
    #5

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