90+ Days of NoFap (Why I did It, Benefits, Advice)

- - - - - Why I started nofap

I started M at 13, multiple times a day, sometimes P but mostly imagination.
I lost my virginity at 18 to my gf at the time. At best, we had mediocre sex and it was because I could only become semi-hard, not enough for anything special.

After a while I lost the ability to perform at all.. I’d literally flip over & M beside her & fall asleep.. feeling so ashamed. I was so insecure that I even asked her who was better between me & her ex who she admittedly was not over all the way. She wouldn’t answer directly (to spare my feelings).

I used to M while flaccid which I believe made my situation worse. It didn’t help that I was a heavy smoker and moderate drinker. The only thing that saved me was I’m somewhat athletic so presumably my blood flow was more optimal than a smoker and drinker who’s obese.

To this day, I don’t have rock hard e (not yet anyway), but I know for a fact I can perform & she’d walk away happy. That’s not something I could say in my past.

Just so you all know a bit about me & my background, I was bullied as a kid & have had a foot fetish for as long as I can remember. To this day, I’m more interested in a woman’s feet than anything else. I always knew this was “abnormal”.

I always felt like the odd one out or that I had to suppress my quirky nature around others to fit in. I’m 26 years old, 5’11 but a bit skinny, relatively good looking but always lacked confidence & very awkward socially (way less awkward now, but it depends on how I’m feeling at the time, weird I know).

That confidence and awkwardness wavers a lot but I believe it’s all a part of the nofap process. By the way, I can’t stress enough, do not count the days 1 by 1. It will stress you out! Just enjoy the NoFap benefits!

Before I learned about nofap I was depressed, experiencing ED, socially awkward, you name it. & those rare times I did get “lucky” and have a sexual encounter, it was below average at best & I didn’t get another one.

But here’s what REALLY made me want to change my life around…

I went out (alone) on a Saturday night.. there were two lovely looking women sitting down. I approached them & they invited me to sit with them (My approach was solid, but I didnt maintain that initial energy/intrigue).

Throughout the ten minutes of talking with the two women, my main interest and her friend were both making subtle hints, all but telling me to invite her to my place... they were waiting for me to seal the deal.

At one point, she looked me dead in the face and said, “Tell me what you’re really looking for”. And you guessed it, I played the nice-guy role & said I wanted a girlfriend. I did that because I thought men had to beat around the bush & basically lie to get what they want. However, this is not the case. Women want men to be real about their intentions & be confident

Quick disclaimer I do actually want a wife someday, but seeing as she already had a child of her own, I did not want a long-term relationship…… but I definitely wanted to have intercourse with her at the time.

Long story short, the girls decided to go home. She took my number down but even I knew she wasn’t going to use it. I went home that night more depressed than ever. This will sound dramatic but I felt like less of a man.. That might’ve hurt more than any girl calling me out my name could. Not exactly sure why. With that being said, I’m extremely happy this night happened. It was the motivation I needed.

- - - - Benefits of Nofap

I started nofap to defeat ED & to learn to assert myself, be a man. I have accomplished all these goals. Some of the other personal benefits I’ve noticed:

1.) More assertive in all areas of life, more confident.
2.) Deal with rejection much easier.
3.) Actually expect female encounters to go my way, and when they don’t I can move on.
4.) More serious about personal growth, back in school hoping to secure six figure employment.
5.) Eye contact much more natural, it’s not about staring someone down, it’s just about not being afraid or feeling inferior. (Tip, make people look down before you do, but don’t creep them out, it’s not a staring contest)
6.) Respect from peers. People want me to succeed & generally believe in me. They think higher of me because I dress and move with purpose. I take each personal relationship much more seriously.
7.) Manly humility. I don’t mind moving out the way for someone to pass through the door first, I’m secure & don’t have to take major action to prove it.
8.) Sex Libido.
9.) No need to rush my statements. When I do speak, people listen.
10.) More attractive.. slightly deeper voice, “glowing” face, more of a manly presence, less goofiness.


- - - - Advice

1.) DO NOT count the nofap days one at a time.. I put 90+ days in the title as a rough estimate, really could be 130+.
2.) DO NOT attempt to manipulate the process or edge.
3.) DO NOT stay stuck on Day1, persevere (day1 imo will always be the toughest).
4.) DO NOT activate any triggers (no P sites, avoid Instagram & social media).
5.) DO NOT feel discouraged or think you’re fully cured because of a little progress.
6.) Stay safe, STDs still exist & more people have them than you think. You can’t tell just off looks!
7.) Read success stories like these ONLY if you feel like you need to. Over analyzing and overthinking may lead into PMO.
8.) Understand there are libido issues for other men & even some women. Don’t feel ashamed.
9.) Be prepared for ups and downs in your sexual desire, PMO urges & mood swings.
10.) Despite your progress, some women will still attempt to bring you down. Don’t base your self-worth on what a random thinks of you. She’s just a person.
BONUS.) Hansom or Ugly, Small or Tall, be confident & assertive at all times. Focus on improving yourself & women will become more attracted to you.

 

Imo counting the days one by one adds unnecessary stress. A lot of people psychologically trip themselves up. They become focused on making it past that certain day or month. The focus should be on quitting completely.

Instead of actively finding ways to be productive and improve yourself, you're subconsciously adding pressure to be ‘perfect’ each day. You’ll begin to compare your results to other people who may gain positive results a bit quicker than you.

for example, “ you might have really been excited to see nofap day30, thinking you would be relieved of any urges and that you would now have rock hard e after 30 days. On the other hand if you just let the process complete, no matter how many days it takes you’ll be better off.

Instead, you should be focused on your own personal progress. You’ll find bs articles on how nofap is a sham. You’ll become unmotivated because you’re not seeing the success right away, or because you haven’t experienced having a rockhard e by a certain day

Again this is just my opinion. Other people may prefer counting the days one by one, there isn’t necessary a right or wrong answer. Glad to see someone could relate to the post, hope I helped in some way.

 

Thanks!

 

*UPDATE* I quit smoking and began running/working out & the results are AMAZING!

Smoking/Drinking while doing nofap will make the process significantly more tedious because both activities affect blood flow.. and you won’t experience the best results

 

Truly glad I helped in some way. Best of luck in your journey!

 

Thank you I appreciate it. s*x life has definitely improved for them.. I don’t feel 100% satisfaction from the s*x all the time likely because of the years I’m M flaccid & watched P.
I know eventually I will gain that natural desire for natural s*x with a real woman & id say I’m about 60% there.

After 15-20mins it starts to feel like a homework assignment sometimes. Trust me I’m not just always having s*x with other women but depending on the woman I’m with, the desire may be there the whole time.

 

1. keep going hoping for the best in your journey!