hi guys n girls...ive been lurking and learning from this site on and off for quite some time,feel its time to commit more. at 8-9 looked through undie draws but didnt know quite why.by 10-11 was looking in catalogues at women in lengerie and swimsuits. masterbated at 11 for first time,thought id broken myself..lol that was it ...i was addicted.from there it was topless newspaper models (bless them)a great source of inspiration and onto to playboy,videos,dvds and eventually the internet...WOW the internet was all the other inspirations rolled into one X 1000.you poor young men ive gone through PIED and lost interest in real life sex in favour of pixels and like most my tastes have escalated to more and more extremes due to my desensitisation and availability to access such genre's last year i went over 100 days no pmo and decided to treat myself to a AMP massage knowing i would get an happy ending. my sensitivity was through the roof. i thought by going to these girls i could get the physical touch my brain and body craved every few weeks while still abstaining from pmo on my own......i was WRONG ! i slowly returned to my own ways and increased my visits to AMP seeking new girls and returning to masterbating to pixels im back now (40 days)clean of pmo and AMP and back on track. nofap is a great source of inspiration and knowledge to help in our journeys guys and i appreciate it for making me feel not alone in my quest for a better life
Sorry I’m not familiar with the acronyms PIED and AMP (pertaining to the massage). Could you please expand them for me?! Anyhow, I remember my first day venturing into this world of PMO and later days some as well. When I was about 15 (or 16, cannot remember exactly…and yeah I was always a late bloomer I guess) I knew about some R rated movies my parents were trying to keep from me to protect me (that they had put in a box in their closet) and knew where they were keeping them. One day as they left to go on some errands or something I decided I was going to be one of the pretty cool guys and watch something from them. I ended up choosing the movie Broken Arrow starring Christian Slater and John Travolta (on VCR back then as was the common format, now basically gone) and there is a scene in which Christian Slater gets down with a blonde woman inside a train car on the move. That was it. That moment right there spurred me into action and led me down to where I am today. It evolved from that point gradually to include women in magazines showing off lingerie, to internet images, to late night porn movies on Dish Network, all way to full blown movies and images on the phone. I never ventured into the more radical stuff, such as any kinds of homosexual stuff, bestiality, or God forbid, younger than of age, knowing my orientation and having followed my teachings from a young age against other stuff, but eventually it all just became the same to me, like just going through the motions (despite believing every time it would be different, which your mind does to you despite knowing it won’t. Funny that). I stopped for a time, getting sick in the past with mental health issues and turning to God for help again, but eventually I gave up on doing what is right in God’s eyes and it found it’s way back to me in the form of junk e-mails. Relatable.
PIED = PORN INDUCEDERECTILE DYSFUNCTION APM = ASIAN MASSAGE PARLOUR very relateable i remember feeling so aroused at the lingerie sections of a catalogue but after so much escalation very little of anything stirred me then last year i went over 100 days no PMO and was watching bridgerton on netflix and i saw a beatiful females thigh lol i was instantly aroused ,this confirmed by leaving porn alone i was back to or close to normal life was simpler when we wete younger lol
Thanks for clarifying that… I couldn’t agree more and I sometimes miss those days because of the minimal damage inflicted by desensitization and the powerful feelings that went along with towards girls (now more women). I often wish I could go back in time and warn myself about the dangers of PMO and have another chance at life.
