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I am so tired mentally and physically

Discussion in 'Compulsive Sexual Behavior' started by Deleted Account, Sep 14, 2022.

  1. Sep 14, 2022 #1
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    11 years of this addiction has dealt me really bad, wasted thousands of days and turned me into a pervert. I am convinced now that If I did not get my shit together I will drown in this deep world of darkness. 11 years have turned me to be conditioned to really severe material. even going into forums which shows gore and inserting things anally. I don't seem to get pleasure from watching normal stuff anymore. I need to cut this shit out completely before it destroys me. I will get back on track and will find myself an accountability partner and keep a journal.
     
    Deleted Account, Sep 14, 2022
    Deleted Account, Sep 14, 2022
    #1
    Cherubim and 1amth3l1ght like this.
  2. Sep 14, 2022 #2
    Clearminded_1234

    Clearminded_1234 Fapstronaut

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    Praying for you man. It was 23 years for me with this addiction so I can relate. Didn't get into really extreme stuff though but I understand why people go down that rabbit hole. It fucking sucks but there is always light at the end of the tunnel. I'm about 40ish days NoFap/retaining in feeling like a new person. Hope to hear your tremendous progress to your best self.
     
    Clearminded_1234, Sep 14, 2022
    Clearminded_1234, Sep 14, 2022
    #2
    Cherubim and Enduringthroughpain like this.
  3. Sep 14, 2022 #3
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    thank you for your supportive reply man, I am looking forward to push hard through this and with god's will I will be able to quit this.
     
    Deleted Account, Sep 14, 2022
    Deleted Account, Sep 14, 2022
    #3
  4. Sep 15, 2022 #4
    luckybeard

    luckybeard Fapstronaut

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    I haven't developed taste to extreme porn, but I have some dark fantasies which can get into something if I feed them. Another night while I was a on a lose I started to search for nekro pron, I found some forum where users posted dead women bodies, from crime scenes or morgues I couldn't stop looking but then I was so disgused.
    Don't feed your demons, the less you give them your energy the less power they have over you. Get clean it will go away.
     
    luckybeard, Sep 15, 2022
    luckybeard, Sep 15, 2022
    #4
    Enduringthroughpain and 1amth3l1ght like this.
  5. Sep 15, 2022 #5
    1amth3l1ght

    1amth3l1ght Fapstronaut

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    You are at the right place right now and I can promise you that quitting will change your behaviour towards PMO a lot!

    Before I quit I also started to look at things that I normally found utterly disgusting. That's how I knew that it was time to change.
    Fight this! You can do it!
     
    1amth3l1ght, Sep 15, 2022
    1amth3l1ght, Sep 15, 2022
    #5
    Enduringthroughpain likes this.
  6. Sep 20, 2022 #6
    from2003

    from2003 Fapstronaut

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    My Journal
    Bro you got a be strong this situation will never going to easy please bro please please bro please please bro please please bro please remember something what your parents are doing for you and what you are doing for your loves to give up on this addiction this is very worse addiction if you got additional drugs it will considered as good as compared to this addiction because nobody knows that you are consuming dopamine in huge ratio you feel me bro please now please bro bro please the world need more people like you you got you have to be successful otherwise nothing will going to work bro please bro please
     
    from2003, Sep 20, 2022
    from2003, Sep 20, 2022
    #6
    Enduringthroughpain likes this.
  7. Sep 30, 2022 #7
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    I have been relapsing since I wrote this post. This is all my fault, although now I am convinced that the addiction is absolutely real and the withdrawal symptoms send me back to porn for relief but I have a choice in this. Even if it's hard, I can choose to not do it. To remember my god, my family and myself. I am messing up myself completely and shattering my present and my future for just a bunch of stupid videos. I seriously would like to nuke this whole industry and the multi-billionaire companies that are making profit from our misery. I am going to set myself free by god's will this time. No more of this horse shit.
     
    Deleted Account, Sep 30, 2022
    Deleted Account, Sep 30, 2022
    #7

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