I'm... really feeling it rn, and idk how to deal with it in a healthy way. Does simply ignoring it work?
Memories are coming to mind that I don't even desire anymore, but because they are associated with the appeasement of how I am feeling right now, I think about them.
Sometimes yes! But I've found generally no. Especially if you don't have something to do instead. Find something engaging but not so difficult it's overwhelming. I find that doing something away from the computer really helps as well. Go on a walk, go talk to a friend, do some exercise, read a book, or whatever it is you enjoy.
that is great advice, but as a follow up question: what if your in a scenario where you cant do that, for example, taking a shower? Do you or anyone else have something for that?
I always go to the cold showers. Everytime I want real sex or self service. Everytime it is hard, i go to the cold shower. Every bad desire ends after one minute in cold shower. I recommend to take morning showers to all grown men. I for example wake up often when it is in hard mode and cold shower always helps, as otherwise I'd be tempted to masturbate it soft. Cold shower does it for me without touching.
It usually go away after a bit. So it's a matter of staying busy doing something, far from a computer if possible.
Glad you got something that works for you. In a cold climate here, so during the winter time a cold shower is out of the question.
This is true and yet in those moments I often think "but I have nothing else to do but sit on the computer." DO SOMETHING ELSE.
In this scenario, I try to think of the world surrounding me in a third person perspective. Temptation is a pain of wanting more, and pain does keep us in the present, but it also blinds us from our future, and the mistakes of the past. The best thing you can do with pain is to accept it rather than resisting it; going to porn or masturbation would be an act of resistance. If you fight any form of pain, it only generates more of it. In consciously accepting that you are having an urge, and *deciding* not to indulge in it, temptation fades with time. Finding another activity to do is how you move beyond simple acceptance. If you can't decide to do anything, pick something at random, and do it despite how boring it may seem. More is lost by indecision than any decision.
Have a wan k! Seriously if I’m really needing sex and don’t have a partner. For me it’s better to let one out to something really vanilla and inline with my values off YouTube (porn sites are all blocked) or to fantasy than it is to let it build and build to the point I want a dominatrix making me bang a Trans, whilst plying me with wine and poppers! And then feeling depressed asf for 2 weeks after..
lol What do you do when your body is craving sex? Kind of obvious but it’s always going to crave sex that’s how Mother Nature or god made you!” I'm... really feeling it rn, and idk how to deal with it in a healthy way.” I assumed your sexual compulsions rather than porn (as we’re in this section) had became unhealthy like mine had with weird kinks etc? for me getting rid of the mindset that all masturabtion should carry a sense of guilt or shame and were actually pretty natural and a better way of dealing with excess urges which lead to extreme compulsions was a better option. Obviously address core issues, have a solid morning routine, set goals plan, journal, build a life you don’t want to escape from, have accountability, block adult content. Learn all the hacks but changing my mindset that I wasn’t a failure for rubbing one or two out a week has made things easier. Your call though more than one way to skin a cat, is dating an option you’d consider? (Not with me btw)
Im in the same boat as you, but this might not be the right course of action for everyone. I went from yanking multiple times a day to porn down to a couple times a week. Twice a week without porn is reasonable, however it can be a slippery slope back to porn. This has taken me some time but it is progress. The shame and guilt from looking at the porn last days after. One day I'd like to do a 90 day reboot. We are all on our own path. Spank bank is better than porn in my opinion and thats where I'm at right now.
Yeah dude, you have to ease yourself out of it, cold turkey doesn't work with a habit like this. No M at all, or very little M is your next goal?
Nice man. Keep going with whatever is working for you. I myself don't believe in a healthy sexual fantasy, but it sounds like a good stepping stone compared to the other options.
You still might give it a try. It was recently 5 degrees (F) where I live, and I still took a cold shower. Yes, it was cold AF. But I knew it wouldn't kill me, so I just forced myself to bear it. And eventually my body acclimated, my breathing calmed down, and I was able to stand in the water without losing my mind. And fapping was absolutely the furthest thing from my mind, hahaha. The great thing about cold showers is that your mind is literally incapable of drifting. You are 100% focused on the present moment--just dealing with that cold water, focusing on staying in, trying to regulate your breathing, etc. When that cold water hits you, you're not thinking about how hot Sarah looked in that last IG post, or that one time you had marathon sex with the hottest woman you've ever been with. You just think about the water.
