I'm a 27 yr old man trying to make a better life for myself. I used just go to work, come home and game, masturbate, sleep and repeated this for yrs and my life was going nowhere. And then a couple of hrs ago I started 1hr+ edging sessions to multiple videos or compilation videos and i got worse, I couldn't even play video games anymore they were dull, everything was dull and boring. I easily fell asleep at the wheel, I was groggy all the time. It seemed like I was using 90% of my brainpower just to keep track of my wallet,keys, and cellphone, I've been getting really stupid. And I was totally desensitized, I couldn't feel shit. I was ruled by compulsions and I didn't want to work hard anymore, life was horrible, depressing and there was only one escape. I got into heavy debt cause I'd buy anything to make myself feel more worthy, more manly but it didn't fix anything. Last year was when I hit rock bottom I maxed out all my credit, got diagnosed with severe depression, experimented with amphetamines to make me feel alive again, met two dream girls and ruined my chances with both with my anxiousness and being weird in general. Occasionally I would bed a woman but I stopped trying cause I couldn't get hard even with prescription sex pills. My mind was constantly fogged, I was even struggling to speak without stuttering cause my mind was looking for words it knows but couldn't find, For me the mindfog has been the worst because I was such a smart kid with a huge vocabulary and that's all gone now. I was coming into work 3-4 hrs late daily, I'd be fired if I didn't work for family. But then I stumbled on some antiporn stuff and read about the biology of it all, and then the internet testimonials like the ones on this site, and I began to realize that porn was Infecting every part of my life. So the last six months I've been trying to dump the habit. At first I decided I would cut back, and I went from fapping 2-3 times a day every day to once a day every other, it didn't change anything so I tried to go 90 days, I made it to 40 days before having sex, it was the best sex ever! Even though only lasted a minute, the arousal and physical sensation of foreplay and penetration were incredible, I had had sex before but it was always forced and aided with drugs. And so I saw how great it good be without fapping, But then the chaser got me, I relapsed the next day and a few porn-filled months later here I am ready to be a fapstronaut and take control of my life. I thought it'd be better to do it with others this time and I hope I'm able to help in the process, porn is carving out our masculinity and turning us into masturbating monkeys, we need to help each other.
Hey Jefferson I can relate to some parts of your story and I too have been in that work, game, masturbate and sleep cycle. I am glad you've discovered nofap. Welcome aboard
I can relate on the depression and loss of vocabulary, the forgetfulness and desensitization. I just came here a few hours ago I hope I can make it through, and good luck to you too!
Brother, it's like you took the words out of my mouth. Brain Fog? Check Loss of vocabulary? Check Anxiety/Anxiousness? Check General desensitization? Check Work, video games, porn and sleep? Check Life going nowhere? Check I always wondered what was causing this but never was able to figure out on my own it was the very thing that I thought was keeping me happy all these years. To find out that it was the root cause of all my problems completely opened my eyes and I've vowed to never go back to that lifestyle, no matter what happens in the future. I have experienced so much joy in the little time that I've gone without it that I know quitting was the best decision I've ever made in my life. Stay strong and fight the good fight man! And welcome aboard!
