I just came across a watchmojo video about Porn addiction today and learnt about NoFAP. I am pretty scared because all the things I kept denying myself revealed itself and seems to be true.I just read the introduction and I can relate to every single thing mentioned in it. Im a 27 years old guy and have been fapping ever since I discovered it myself 12 years ago. Started with TV, then into mainstream porn and now only the most sick perverted videos turn me on. I am constantly ashamed of my habit and fear and its only a matter of time until someone finds out what kind of a sick guy I am. Being a computer geek, I can literally track down any kind of video I want on the internet (i've honed google search skills just for this). I fap atleast twice most days since last 8 years and in extreme cases I fap until my balls hurt. Im currently living away from home and I have literally no one to talk to. I have extreme social anxiety and find it difficult to talk to women even if they hit on me cause I feel im worthless and will never be able to keep anyone happy. I do however respect women extremely and never even managed to touch or talk to anyone in reality. The only time I managed to get into bed with a girl I had PIED cause the only thing I could ever think of was my fantasies. When they say ignorance is bliss , they really mean it. Getting high and going on the internet to find the most sick and perverted videos is the only thing I do nowadays. I literally want to do thousands of things but I can never do one thing for more than like 30 minutes and then I get the urge to fap. Failing a level in a game more than 2-3 times would instantly make me want to fap. There are countless number of times when I refused to go out with my freinds and family becuase I wanted some alone time to fap. Lately Ive started to hate myself very badly which started giving me submissive fantasies and self abusive tendencies and now that I know my life is doomed. Everywhere I read about masturbation, they always said its a healthy habit and this was what kept me pushing forward until I came upon nofap. Even though everything makes sense on this website, my mind keeps on telling everything is bullshit and this is just like religious propaganda. I think the longest Ive gone without fapping is 3 days which usually ends in multiple fap sessions in quick succession. I am basically from India which is a very conservative country you are not supposed to have sex before marriage. The internet literally wrecked my life cause I was extremely frustrated as a teen and it gave me all I needed (or atleast I thought so). I will try to make a effort to stop this but I am more scared than confident now.
Get a sig w/ a timer. Stick to it. Go to the gym, work on your career or school. Build a life worth living. All of that is going to be difficult.
Hey man you took a colossal first step in joining this community, so good for you! I know with time you'll beat this addiction you just have to believe in yourself which I know sounds like typical BS but it's true
I am also a computer,tech, and geek. I learned some techniques to google efficiently but I used all the benefits knowing such tech for PMO. Recently, I also learned so I have basic understanding of tech works. Always had to bypass the all the tools that could prevent from PMO. Good luck.
