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Anxiety is killing me .. time to break this.

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by fractalise, Aug 17, 2016.

  1. Aug 17, 2016 #1
    fractalise

    fractalise New Fapstronaut

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    OK. So it's been a long journey .. first memory of porn was when I was primary school when found my dad's stash. It has been a constant struggle ever since. Have had months of freedom, but now with with proliferation of net, too easy to access. Now I'm married with kids .. we r both working and the busyness of life means love life with the wife is sporadic at best. So easy out has been porn. Sometimes I justify that it's easier to do porn than try to bug the wife. But I think it's destroying me. Recently feeling stressed and anxious nearly all the time. Part of it is life and work etc .. but I think this is a big one. Tried many things, so found this site, and going to give it a go!
     
    fractalise, Aug 17, 2016
    fractalise, Aug 17, 2016
    #1
    i_wanna_get_better1 and Grekle like this.
  2. Aug 18, 2016 #2
    Grekle

    Grekle Fapstronaut

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    Same boat. Best of luck. Day 2 for me.
     
    Grekle, Aug 18, 2016
    Grekle, Aug 18, 2016
    #2
  3. Aug 18, 2016 #3
    i_wanna_get_better1

    i_wanna_get_better1 Fapstronaut

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    Welcome to the forum. Many people think our problem would go away when we got married and had a steady source of sex. But our problem is not how much sex we want/get. Addicts use porn to alter, medicate, sooth, numb or escape negative emotions. You mention stress and anxiety. We use it like alcoholics use alcohol and drug addicts use drugs. We can be having sex 24 hours a day and not be sated.

    Your justification to use porn is common. Addicts often value their relationship with porn over their relationship with others. PMO seems so much more efficient and easy. But it only gives us a hollow, empty feeling.

    Only when we use techniques that address addiction do we make progress. Educate yourself at www.yourbrainonporn.com. Start a journal in the folder for the appropriate age group. Find an accountability partner in that folder too. Identify your physical and emotional triggers. Come up with a list of distractions for when the urges hit. Find an enjoyable substitute for porn because it will leave a void. Talk to your wife and inform her what is going on... secrets kill intimacy which kills relationships. Confide in someone in the real world if possible. Seek therapy if you uncover a mental health issue such as depression or anxiety.

    Recovery is possible. I hope you find success on your journey.
     
    i_wanna_get_better1, Aug 18, 2016
    i_wanna_get_better1, Aug 18, 2016
    #3
    WifeInTheDark likes this.

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