PIED and ED drugs. Please HELP me!

I posted on this same subject a week or so ago, and the consensus was just what I expected, it works different for everybody. That's your answer in a nutshell. It worked for some, others it didn't. So it really is a trial by fire type of thing. I will say this, at 23 there is no reason you should be on ED drugs. At 23, before online porn ( I'm in my early 40's) I would masturbate like crazy to desires, HBO, magazines, Porn I rented at the video store, and still had no problem attaining and keeping erections. It wasn't until I began masturbating to online porn about 12 years ago that my PIED began. My concern with you is this, it's well established that young men who began to masturbate to porn at an early age, before they even had sex, or had experience of naturally responding to a woman will take much longer to recover from PIED then men who already had great normal sex, then became addicted to online porn masturbation. I think maybe some research into how PIED happens and why it happens, and the recovery in terms of age groups, etc, would benefit you. I'm not saying ED drugs are bad or not to go there, just do some research.

 

It has been working for me consistently for the past 20 years, except for some rare occasions when I'd overdone it with PMO binging. A word of warning, though. Using ED drugs may not be free from long term effects. For me, the original plan was to use them temporarily to get back on track. Instead, they've enabled me to keep up the facade of everything being ok with me while suffering from a two decade long porn habit. I would go as far as to say that taking ED drugs to be prepared for intercourse with my wife has become a habit in it's own right and I assume that at some point I will have to pay the price for that, too (besides spending considerable amounts of money on medication, of course).

Stu

 

I hid the symptoms of my addition from my wife using ED drugs. I took one drug for the PE and V**gra for the PIED. I was able to excuse my poor sexual performance on 'getting older', but when I got DE then that was a symptom that was too bizarre and raised a lot of suspicions. The drugs acted as another crutch in keeping my addiction a secret. After I quit PMO my sexual dysfunction symptoms all cleared up within a month. There were some episodes where things didn't work right... and I think that was a legitimate 'just getting older' reason. But also the anxiety and fear of not having a strong erection went away because my wife was now aware of and part of my recovery. The secrecy was making my ED symptoms worse.

Is your girl aware of your addiction? You mention having a 73 day streak... how was your performance during that streak? If you are 7 days into your current streak then you are on your way towards recovery and just need a few more weeks for your 'equipment' to recover. But if you are hiding your addiction/recovery then the psychological causes will still be there. I can sense that you are living in fear that your secret will manifest itself before you complete your reboot. I don't know how serious your relationship is... but if it's a serious one then she needs to be included... for her sake and yours!

Plus, those pills are expensive! Insurance doesn't cover them so they can cost almost $20 a dose! An addict can justify paying that price to avoid shame and embarrassment, but it's such an unnecessary cost to keep a secret.

 

i_wanna_get_better1: thanks for sharing. These discussions really do help. May I ask how long you had a PMO habit? Being able to get and sustain an erection without the help of pills is one of my goals.

Stu

 

I'm in my 40's and had my habit for over 25 years. I had no problems PMOing and having sex for most of that time. Only within the last 7 years or so did the physical symptoms start to show up. I hated trying to make the 'is-this-a-V**gra-worthy-night?' decision... that so cheapened something that should be a romantic and bonding experience with my wife

I stopped taking the meds on Day 1 (I quit cold turkey) because I wanted to see how my body was performing naturally. I couldn't tell how much was PMO related and how much was I really just 'getting older'. Turns out most of my symptoms was because of my addiction. My PE cleared up first, then the DE went away, and lastly most of the PIED went away within a month. Again, there are times when things don't go so well, but we laugh it off and try again later. Freedom from fear is one of the biggest benefits... I didn't realize how much energy I was expending on hiding my secret and hiding my anxiety.

 

Thanks again. Your response once again somewhat painfully reminded me of the absurdity of the PMO addiction cycle. Especially the first paragraph really resonated with me. I pop a pill most nights these days, just in case and it does have both physiological and psychological implications I'm really not fond of, e.g., the feeling of entitlement it creates ("I'm prepared, the effect will only last so long, why isn't she in the mood, etc."), it's really really pathetic. Plus I seem to have lost the ability to distinguish between being horny and just longing being close to my wife. Again, I realize how much work lies ahead in addition to just quitting PMO.

Stu

 

Hi there. V***a will work just fine at your age, you should keep a pill near by for just in case, it will take the load off your mind and ease the anxiety, and will allow you to rewire better. You shoud try some touching and cuddling without it, and if you need to take it, go on. If you ever choose to let your girlfriend know about the issue, you should stop taking pills and really focus on your recovery. Good luck!

 

What you describe is classic PIED - inflation then deflation. I understand the stress of having a long distance relationship. You want to pack in as much fun as possible that will last you until the next time you see her. If you've had a few unsuccessful attempts already then of course you don't want to have another!

A few pointers about V**gra. It takes 20 minutes to start to work. It takes longer if you have a full stomach. It won't give you instant boners but it will make you more responsive to stimulation.

Your plan to eliminate porn is the best thing you can do because it will eventually destroy a lot of other things in your relationship. Again, I don't know how serious you are with your girl or what kind of future you see with her, but I think this visit needs to be about disclosing your addiction. I think the bedroom activities needs to have a lesser priority. If you can strengthen the foundation of your relationship then you won't be devastated if something negative happens in the bedroom. She loves you for who you are, not for the sex. It's fine to have a backup plan, but stay focused on your recovery.

 

This sounds like its not just the mental side of PIED. Sounds like you may have issues with regaining physical sensitivity from the death grip. It takes a while for your package to regain the nerves and sensitivity to touch, as well as the mental side of things from high speed porn.

You need to leave your dong alone and let it and your brain reset. I don't know if it helps yet, but I've been trying to apply lotion to mine periodically to help the skin regain it's softness and sensitivity. I'm 40 days in and while I am not having sex with my fiancé until we get married in 2 months, I've noticed significantly harder and longer maintained erections while making out.

 

I think that sounds like a great course of action. I would add that for me it helps to attempt to no longer stare at girls bodies that I see in public, and even staying away from tv shows. I only want real interactions with the woman I love. My goal is to make her the absolute standard of beauty for me. I can no longer allow other people or screens to be a source of any sexual attraction.

 

I tried C*alis, which is the same as V*** but C*** lasts longer.

It worked great for a couple of years and then it didn't work anymore!