In quest of a change

Hi everyone,

My name is Leo, I'm Belgian, 23 years old. It's been a while now that I try to change the organization of my day (wake up early, find some rituals, eat healthy blablaba...). And I am really struggling to apply those changes recently, feeling that I am not as productive as I want to.

I had some reflexions about it and of course, masturbation came to my mind and I forced myself to write down about it to crystallize the problem. "Be honest with yourself, you masturbate almost every f____ day since you reached 14 years old. It takes you ten minutes to two hours (really rarely, but still) in addition to all the drain of attention and motivation afterwards, which happen before AND after the act. Not to mention the guilt you take for yourself every time."

At first, I didn't think it was such a bad thing. I am in a long distance relationship, and half of the time, I thought about my beautiful girlfriend and the amazing experiences we had together. Moreover, the feeling of relieve and pleasure it got me sometimes made me feel happy (I know, dopamine...). Finally, I stopped porn a long time ago but found myself drifting to other kind of websites, such as ecchi mangas (never hentai) and webcams. I realized I was way more attracted to the teasing that the actual raw porn itself, which I didn't look for years.

I'm not addicted to porn, but this truly is, as well, an unsane sexual addiction I want to get rid of. However, I do plan to enjoy having sex with my girlfriend whenever we feel like. I'm really interested on the feedback and advices you can give me, and I will try to be as strong as possible during this NoFap challenge !

 

Hi ! Ecchi mangas are mangas that do not involve porn but are triggering your libido in a lot of different ways, panties shots, suggestions, ambiguous situations or other kind of teases. I hope I didn't trigger anything

 

Day 1 : very busy at the time and it looks like it helps a lot. As we say, busy is your best friend! More than 24h already, small start.