Over 100, but still not there! Help!

Hey everyone! I'm happy to say I'm over 100 days in! It hasn't been a perfect hard mode time, but only had a couple hiccups. Anyway, I am going strong and staying away from porn but I do have an issue. I've been sick the last week and along with it has been a total erection flatline. Even with my fiancé making out I have had 0 erection and motivation. Just tonight again I was totally feeling it at first then it just all drained away for no reason.

So my concern is that in 11 days we get married. I dread the potential of getting to my wedding night and being totally flatlined and worthless. However, it would certainly be an earned consequence of my sin. I plan to be open and honest with her about it before then to try and keep her from unnecessarily feeling unattractive or that it is her fault. I'm doing this for her in effort to have a pure and unstained marriage, so I think she should be very understanding.

Anyway, anyone else gotten this far and have any ED flatline experiences? How long did it last for you?

 

Thank you all for the encouragement! I talked to my fiancé 2 nights ago and told her that it was a possibility, why, and assured her that it was not her fault at all. She was very sweet and it didn't seem to phase her at all. She just said she loves me no matter what, marriage is about much more than sex and that whatever happens we will work through it. It's incredible to have a woman that values honesty and is understanding. Further confirmation that I snagged a winner.

Also, we made out that night and yesterday to wonderful erection results. Yesterday I didn't know if it would ever go away lol. She had me going pretty strong. I know a flatline can always come back and that I'm probably not totally out of the woods yet, but at least I know it still works lol.

 

There was maybe 3 times I looked at some P briefly but didn't M, at least not to O. One time I did accidentally O even though I tried to keep from it and called it a mulligan. And 2 times I M'd without any porn at all, only thinking about my fiancé. The rest of the time was hard mode. I know its far from perfect, but I know myself, and resetting my counter and starting all over every time would have done more harm than good. I'm making forward motion, even with a couple hiccups. Not gonna let that stop me. The higher that counter gets, the more empowered I am to refrain. Lately, even though we aren't married just yet, when I've been home I've been wearing my wedding ring as a reminder, which has helped a ton. I refuse to do it while wearing that ring.

As an update, we are 4 days from the wedding and I'm going strong! Lately making out with her I've had a raging boner and libido out my ears. Cant wait till the wedding night!

 

Just wanted to update this! We are over a month into marriage! The wedding night was full of nerves, but after a not super hard/solid first E, we had a better second go in the same night. After that we gradually have gotten better and erections now rarely struggle. The 3rd or 4th day in on our mini honeymoon I got a little tired and the pressure of having to perform was giving me a little anxiety, but I pushed through it. After a month of going at it pretty much every day things are going well. I've been able to maintain E and hold off O until she gets a couple or more in for herself. If I start to get winded my E loses a little steam but after switching for a min or to and me getting a break it gets right back up. I think that's just me needing to get in better shape. We have started working out more together and as I do more cardio it's becoming less of an issue. Even the time of day hasn't been an issue. Morning, noon, night, and plenty of different rooms. It's been great!

I'm crazy glad I started noFap well before we got married though. Coming in much more clean of porn has helped me in so many ways. I appreciate her, enjoy the experiences, and don't feel like every day is filled with shame, darkness, and that something massive is constantly holding me back. Keep it up guys and gals, it's worth it!