Can't fight this addiction alone

Hi All,

My Name is Nitin, I am 28 yrs old and i have been watching porn from almost 15 years. Unfortunately and embarrassingly enough, i first encountered porn in the form of magazines stored in the rack of our house in a suitcase belonging to my Dad, those were the times when computer or mobile porn was not easily accessible to us. In those teen years, i felt really excited and very thrilled to have found this large collection, which i would go back again and again for the arousals it provided me. Then it graduated to videos on computer as soon as we got one and it just never stopped from then onwards as it was so easily accessible with a click.

Though i wrongly believed that it was normal and ok to masturbate once in few days, it slowly took control over me and became an addiction before even having realized the harm it was doing to my social and sex life. It is effecting my motivation levels and my self-confidence making me feel like a complete failure, not having achieved the goals and ambitions i dreamed for myself.

Though i had come across this site many months before, I choose to not take advantage of this and tried on my own to quit this habit. I have failed myself again and again trying to quit on my own and after reading some inspiring stories and the same struggle everyone is undergoing here, i want to commit myself to reach out here whenever i have the urges,journal my feelings and gain the support needed to get rid of this horrible addiction.

Hope all of us can fight this together and realize the amazing results of the nofap life !

Thanks,
Nitin

 

Thanks r8js for your encouraging words.. so far, so good. Have consciously tried to stay with the urges so far and tried to look at all the ill it has done so far reminding myself of the horrible guilt that follows each time. Will continue to be mindful and take it one day at a time.

 

I was able to abstain for 10 days in a row and then i went out with friends for some drinks which eventually turned into many drinks. Coming home after being drunk, i couldn't restrain myself and watched porn. It made me realize that i have to control myself from getting too much drunk in order to beat PMO. One of the strategies is definitely put a control on Booze.