Keep up the good work by continuing to be a great dad! Kids really need their parents especially in their formative years for good emotional development. I didn't get that attention and love as my dad was emotionally distant from me and my mom was always working in my formative years and it came to bite me later as an adult. I like hearing stories of dads bonding with their kids.
Day 2 Wow! I am really enthused today. By not allowing myself to surf the net after 7 PM, I discovered that the voice in my head became louder and louder. My inner critic was so loud the first thing I wanted to do was to distract myself. It kept on chirping about why I am a loser, why women don't find me attractive, why I am not a success essentially telling me that there is something intrinsically wrong with me. So this is why I love engaging in distracting activities and aimlessly surfing the net with no agenda. I unconsciously don't want to face these automatic thoughts and subsequent emotions. The only thing is that these thoughts did not subside past 12 AM as I did not engage in any form of distraction such as watching a movie. I didn't sleep well. But I am happy I became more aware of my mental state and underlying emotions. Now if I can only calm down this inner critic! Cold Shower: Day 5 of 30 No YouTube Challenge: Day 2 of 10 Wake up at 5.15 am: Day 0 of 4 No Using Internet From 7 PM: Day 2 of 30
day 56 i feeling so sad right now....one thing i learned from this are , when we are in this weak state then the devil will strike you... and so it did.... i texted my friend who was had a crush on me (but i dont like her) ,,,imaginating lucid thing in process... i access the twitter and seing that some young girls go viral in my country, curious to search on the hashtag and BOOM i see some dark picture ...close it immediatly and try my best to not escalate to actually see porn what i learn are 1. social media is fucking disease atm , like i dont know what on people mind right now they enjoyed seeing people suffered and widespread it across the globe without even considered the victim... so avoid it at all cost 2. if u on weak state like mine sleep would be the best activities u can do to spend ur night....if u want to think..do it in the morning and not in your room stay strong fellow mando
day 8/30 frequency of urges hitting me is more today but #noRelapse now i know it will be my triumph this time. Best of luck to all others
day 57 checking in well then again i, so close to relapse... im so curious about the viral girl and download it,,,they tell that it contain bunch of video and picture of her. while waiting the download process i started to thinking, if its worthed? what if the angel of death come while i seeing thoose video...and other though...when the download process is about 1 minute left i canceled it and continue studying
good job bro. whenever you think of relapse ask yourself 1 where it is going to lead me . 2 how it gonna leave me!
Day 87 - @hollyman @Gonarth Seems like we all had some Dark days... I was feeling depressed yesterday and extremely agitated over my tough class I haven’t passed yet. I ended up eating pizza, which I usually avoid and woke up feeling like someone kicked my butt. Seriously.. I feel all the inflammation I usually don’t feel on a No Bread, no dairy diet.. I don’t think I will ever want it which is funny because it used to be a favorite food. Anyway, maybe we can all help each other out of this mood. Today, let’s all use our free will positively. We all get to choose how we feel today. We get to decide how we let things affect us. We may may feel blue, or black... but if we want to be some other color? Who’s stopping us?
Day 11 I've been noticing that the more I sit around binge watching a show the worse I feel. I remember a conversation that took place a few pages back in this forum and it's accurate. The most vulnerable I've felt in these past 11 days is like 3 days ago when I started a series that started taking up my time. I recently finished it and immediately started searching for shows on Hulu that had a very high percentage of showing nudity. I'm trying to stay clean for my future wife and for a future that I can be proud of. I noticed these same feelings of... Sluggishness around day 35 when I fell to the enemy before. I'm hoping that I caught up to them now and by admiring the techniques that caused me to fall earlier, I can now side step them and deliver a solid roundhouse kick to put them out of MY misery. Ever step I take is a lesson that needs to be learned. *Sheds tear*
Day 20 of the challenge (Day 30 personally) I made a huge milestone for my personal streak. I was trying to hard for 30 days and I'm here! Now, on to 60 personal!
9/30 my morning wood was lost for some days but today i got a hard one and that was a tough time trying not to fap
for me repent to god is the answer. when u feel like its a no way u cant avoid to relapse. u must ask to god for forgiveness and power to overcome it social media is full of trap, youtube, hulu, netflix .... i install an app recently called "my time" it show me the amount of time i used mobile phone...and the result is,i used mobile phone for around 3 hour per day on weekend is 5 hour if we sum it, then its almost 24 FUCKING HOURS OF NOTHING !!!!! wasted my life for almost 4 day's in a month, 48 day's in a year .... if i can do a bench press for every time i used mobile phone then maybe have a big chest like model tho keep up the good work bro morning wood is a sign of curing process, it mean ur dick began to become normal like it used to be, do not messed it up by destroy your dick on porn bro
Wise! Because we are imperfect.. we tend to waste time... So instead of watching the hero of the story... let’s get out in real life and BECOME the hero of the story Well done! It feels so good doesn’t it? Now don’t let your guard down. It’s easy to do once you hit that your feeling confident. I’m happy for you. Well done refusing. It gets easier with every time you resist. Now I get irritated when I get wood. I can more or less make it go back to rest on command. This can happen for you one day too! I like how you always help each member, it really encourages us. Would you mind moderating your language? I am not telling you what to do, but I try to lead by example and one thing I had to quit besides PMO was negative bad language. I know that it probably won’t matter to those whose first language isn’t English, but for me, it bothers me. Again, I’m not upset or trying to tell you what do so Holleyman, I’m proud to have you here along side us, I know you want to make this a haven, a safe place where we all feel comfortable. Keep up the good work Mando 3! Day 88 - Life’s been getting rough for me. I admit some was my fault but it’s a little overwhelming so it feels like it’s from the Devil. Like he doesn’t like me changing for the better and helping others improve their lives. I’m relying fully on God and praying a lot. Deep breathing helps too. This is the way
Motivational quote for the day: “Whoever isolates himself pursues his own selfish desires;He rejects all practical wisdom.” Proverbs 18:1
Day 5 After a mini-hiatus from the site, I am back as I try to keep my online activities as low as possible. Today, I feel so great and happy. Wow! I wish I could live in this bubble forever. I don't know what it is but the bottom line is a relapse really screws up your brain chemistry including neurotransmitters and hormones. Also, the internet is a big distraction from life. I have had so much free time to do other things like jogging, cycling, reading, bible study, reading books, meditation e.t.c. I have been wasting so much time on the internet doing a lot of nothing. Know that I feel productive my happiness levels have increased. I was also able to effortlessly wake up this morning at 5 am without an alarm clock. Yes, life on this particular day is great. Cold Shower: Day 8 of 30 No YouTube Challenge: Day 5 of 10 Wake up at 5.15 am: Day 3 of 4 No Using Internet From 7 PM: Day 5 of 30
Day 21 down. Today may prove difficult. I had a dream last night that could cause relapse. This is how i have relapsed in the past. i have prepared for this. Now is the time to test this armor. What a glorious day this may become! I look forward to reporting my victory to you tomorrow!
Day 51. It's been a long time since I've been this busy doing other things instead of sitting in front of a screen. Partying, seeing friends, getting stuff done...and I'm currently on a PSMF-diet. My sobriety isn't in danger right now but I've still got some rough weeks ahead of me. Anybody who ever was on a very low kcal diet could understand I want to limit my screen time even further, so I won't report in for a few days. Stay strong everybody.
I have emerged from the battle yesterday to claim victory. Day 22. Not my glory, but His. Not my battle, but His! The sarlaac wrapped his tentacle around my leg and tried to drag me down. It's ferocious beak and gnashing teeth snapped at me. I tried to blast my way out, but to no avail. I pulled a thermal detonator from my pouch and tossed it into the beasts mouth.