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fallion
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Aug 20, 2014
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  1. Anonymouse

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  1. Anonymouse
Location:
Colorado

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fallion

New Fapstronaut, from Colorado

fallion was last seen:
Aug 20, 2014
    1. StopMO
      StopMO
      Hello Fallion. I just read your story in "about me" and would like to help you in any way I can. I think it's good you are reaching out for help. I am active LDS and can relate to your desire to be a better husband, father, priesthood holder and son of God.
      Aug 14, 2014
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  • About

    Location:
    Colorado
    My story began when I was 15. I hit puberty kinda late and found myself curious about the changes that were happening to other guys, when they weren't happening to me. We just bought our first family computer and suddenly my curiosities had an outlet. I began PMO but would find myself disgusted when a girl would pop up on the screen - I KNEW it was wrong. Yet, I was able to rationalize searches for men, because, well, they don't have anything that I don't right? Thus my sexual template was molded.

    I understand that my story might be different than most, since I'm a male, and most of my troubles have been viewing homosexual pornography. Fast forward 15 years: I'm now married, I have a daughter, and I still consider myself a heterosexual individual. Yet, my vice, that I can't seem to ever shake, will always involve PMO relating to men.

    I fear for what the future holds if I continue this path. Will I lose interest in my wife? Will it destroy my family? Will I turn to darker paths and lose my way? Inevitably, the answers are yes, if I let these problems gestate over time.

    So, I'm here. I'm trying to quit. I love my family. I love my wife. I want to love her more than porn. The rational part of me screams that I do, but the addicted part of me knows the truth. If I truly loved her more than porn, it would no longer be a part of my life. So really my story is a dramatic love story. I face a choice between two lovers. One will bring me happiness, eternal joy, and peace. The other has me in chains and seeks to destroy me - yet it's THAT one that I often return to and fall for, over and over.

    It is my hope and sincere prayer that this love story doesn't end in tragedy. Rather, I would that it ends in triumph and peace - in the arms of my true and tangible love, my wife.

    I'm here for support - for considerate counsel and correction. I'm here because I've tried everything that I know, but I need a little more. Here's to the beginning of the end of my addictions!

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