What is a therapist going to tell me

Are you going to the therapist for other reasons, or is it all tied into PIED? If so, you have to tell him about it otherwise he cant help you.

I know how you feel. Everybody you know is getting laid and you feel left out. Like you'll never get to be apart of that world. Been there. Was very depressed. Was too embarrassed to tell anyone. Dudes in there 20s aren't supposed to have ED. The thing is, if you ignore the problem, it won't go away. And neither will the depression. Took me far too long to decide to fix it.

FYI, all your friends are exaggerating the fuck out of their sex life. And I know you think everyone in a relationship is having amazing sex everyday. I will tell you now that they are not. We have such a skewed idea of what people's sex lives are like from porn.

I've been exactly where you were. Officially quit PM, and you will eventually be cured. Unfortunately the first time through is always the hardest. I know it seems impossible. You'll find there are a lot of stories here that are exactly the same as yours. You are not alone here.

Set small goals. Stay busy. Avoid triggers. And use all the tools and advice in this community.

 

My efforts (falling on my face a lot and failing) of quitting porn has been curing a lot of things. By not having an O for 31 days I feel way clearer, yes sometimes I am agitated and feel like I downed a quadra from Starbucks but I have to tell you from my own personal experience that attempting to wrestle control of PMO has been a game changer, and believe me I have friggin issues!! Anytime your able to identify a behavior that you tell yourself you want to stop over and over and can't and then start taking that control back opens doors. The first door for me was finding this site and realizing I wasn't the only one out there struggling with this. The second door has been literally my front door, I am outside more, mixing it up and doing things. The quote I heard this week on some podcast that really resonates is "we used to use the internet to escape our lives now we go outside to escape the internet" - unknown--
The third door is my eyes, I see better literally, my eyes are clearer and a few people have said man you look good like your rested and you seem calmer. So get your feelings out there and my suggestion is to interview a few therapists its your money your time and its there job, somehow in the past I would tend to just go with some therapist and not advocate for myself, so now I think about who I do my therapy with like where I go to an expensive meal, they better be worth it.

 

This quote is gold. "we used to use the internet to escape our lives now we go outside to escape the internet".

Sitting outside in the garden, relaxing, connecting to the surroundings! it's like a trip that recharges you..

I also have to say I saw a number of therapists before my current one, some good and some not so good. You can go to a once off consultation with another one or two before committing, if you think you could get better help/experience.

My current one specialises in sex issues including porn addiction. General topics come up and in terms of every day things we don't agree on everything, but the advice and help on the addiction is right on point so I'm glad I looked around.

 

A good therapist will always refer you to someone more fitting to your requirements if they are unable to help. Obviously this guy will take on a broad range of clients because he is new. You don't have any obligation to stay with this therapist and it's all about finding one that you work well with.

 

Yeah you have to like the therapist.