Cant clear the weird fantasys out of my Brain..

Hello

I have really hard Problems to not think about the old pornos i watched and always have weird sex fantasys (like getting fucked by a transwomen) specially at the evenings when i lay in my bed i quit everything else i dont look at sexy pics of women and didn't watch porn since nearly 200 days but i cant clear my mind its just to hard to resist because it at least gives some dopamine

i was into a kind of porn that encouraged you to be a sissy a man who acts like a female slut and thats why i have like this 2 personas in me and sometimes its scary how much the porn side controls me and meanwhile i dont wanna fap because of this second person like before i want tohave sex like that but i cant get that with just a click on a site like porn so my mind takes over and i imaging how it would be
sometimes i think about just trying it so i know if i actually like it or if its just in my brain but sometimes i completely forget about it and my like normal man brain takes over its so annoying and when i drink alcohol the porn side takes like nearly full control so i try to stay away from drinking it..

what are your tipps to help me with this ?

 

Yeah i think porn just changed my brain very hard and specially because i am a virgin this fantasys are like my refuge
Real sex is almost scary to me because i could do so may things and this could be not okay and blablabla in the fantasy you can control everything also i have issues with my penis size even doe its like an average size also i now for sure that i cant last longer then 1 minute because my last relapse after a 50 day streak i only needed like 5 seconds to cum i was shocked because it was so fast i could even react to it
But i think the best for me would be to get a good girlfriend that can kinda help
Me clearing this thougths away

But thanks to you and all the other guys that answerd qould have replied earlier but dint get a notificant email...

 

i will read the post later