A Progressive Challenge-A different kind of challenge- all levels

It's day 10/14!

 

Day 10/12 done. It was an easy day. Not many triggers and hence not many urges.

 

1/7.

A clean day. That’s already special for me at the moment. It wasn’t an easy day, but it wasn’t really bad neither.

Great! You’ve got this.

 

9/17 and starting to feel a bit more here and with it. I have had no urges for P or M at all. Which is amazing for me. Normally I relapse every Saturday night and continue till Sunday morning.

Watched Black Panther too which gave me the escapism I needed. But also I deep meaning with has empowered me

 

Day 38/40. Almost there. Feelings the cravings last night. Some edging.

 

Day 34/45...

 

I am starting a new challenge to 10 days. 2/10 so far.

 

You're right, I know. It happens when my fantasy mind takes over. At that point I stop telling the difference between the fantasy in my head and reality. My challenge is keeping my awareness in those moments of fantasy (often when I'm half asleep) and reminding myself what my commitment is. The fantasy just feels so good in that moment. I need to push through the pain of letting it go.

 

Day 17.
I've noticed that my junk is really soft
(the same thing I had when I was on my 30-day streak)

Update-
Ehhhh Valentines Day... Pure memories from 2017
Welcome back emotional roller-coaster, I missed you.

 

Fuck, not again... I'm great all day, and good at night for a couple days, but the second I see something even slightly sexual late at night I lose control of myself. I think this is really bad, I actually remain fully conscious of the fact that I'll be mad at myself afterward and prolong the PMO because of it, and constantly tell myself "I could stop, I just don't feel like it". I'm stuck in this crappy hole and I can't remember to get out. I either need inspiration and practice to say no or some method to train my brain to move away from that. Someone, please help. I want things to go back to how they used to be.

 

Day 3 of 10

 

Day 6/7. Almost at my first goal.

 

omfg, fuck this depression FUCK!

 

day 13, tired but i feel very well

 

2/7

Had a pretty good day. Had some bad thoughts this evening, but they weren’t extremely strong.

You’ll get out of this. I’ve had the same for the past 1,5 week, and I’m back on track now. It’s not easy, but you’ve handled this before, so you can do this! All the best. Stay focussed but don’t focus too much on PMO.

Nice!

 

Very much near to watch porn. in fact I opened google and opened some sexy images of couple with dress on. Then I just got remember my community in 10 seconds and closed the window immediately. It was not porn images but some images of couple with intimate feelings. But I closed them immediately. Because although these images were not nude and porn, but an attractive and dangerous way to porn images. Hardly saved my streak, now on avoid all kind of images even pictures of couple kiss!

 

I did not watch pornography and just have a look on couple kissing and hugging each other with clothes on. No nudity. I am sure I did not break my commitment of watching porn images/movies/scenes. But I will also avoid romance triggering images too (even couple in full dress), so I might not again fall in nudity or pornography.

 

day 50/60