For the longest time, I considered my struggle with pornography and masterbaition (or as it's known to NoFap, PMO) as an unhealthy habit. However, I've come to realize it is more than that, it is an addiction. I've used porn to fuel my lust entrapment since I was 12, and am now 23. While I cannot say it has completely overwhelmed my life (of course, I could be in denial), it has certainly been a partner to my life for far too long. I've tried to quit countless times, unsuccessfully. I think the longest time I've ever gone was about a month. Its hurt my self esteem and my ability to let myself be truly known by others. While I'm an outgoing person, I feel as though I am a character that I portray to others, as I cannot possibly show people the true me. The addict me. So in this way I've struggled with loneliness for years, despite being constantly surrounded by friends and family. I believe kicking PMO can finally allow me to explore who I really am, not just the pieces left over by porn. I'm excited to join this community and finally take true action against this addiction. Not sure how to site works to be honest, I've never even used Reddit beyond casually. Would love input on how to leverage this tool and the relationships I form through it to the best of my abilities.
Welcome! I recommend starting a journal in your age-group sub-category farther down the forum list if you haven't already. God be with you in your struggle!
Jason! I believe was have already interacted on your Newbie post. I will certainly will start a journal in the near future.
Hi there! You'll get a lot of very different perspectives on this forum, which is exactly how it should be, so there's something for everybody to draw from and contribute to whilst we slowly, gently adopt, adapt, and form your own. Just to help get you started can I just offer the following suggestions (and they are only suggestions)? Sorry if any of this is stating the obvious or repeating anything else etc, and I’m sorry if it’s a bit preachy but I'm REALLY fired up at the moment by the videos I've added to the bottom of this message!! 1. Head over to the forums and take your pick. Wade in and see what grabs your interest. Start a thread. Help others and be helped just by getting involved. Plus it’s the PERFECT antidote to fapping!! 2. Don't get into arguments (especially over the usual politics/religion stuff) We are all human here and we are in this together regardless of our chosen 'path' (even if you believe truth is a 'pathless' land!) Sharing is one thing- imposing is quite another. And besides, you really won't find a more caring, well intentioned bunch of folk anywhere! 3. Check out the website yourbrainonporn if you haven't already and make use of the brilliant resources there. 4. Consider doing a 90 day reboot and get yourself a tracker (see bottom of this post) Even if you intend to continue M&O you really do want to completely disassociate from porn altogether (for good!!) 5. Be open to new possibilities and perspectives. Take up something new and focus on that rather than focusing what you are 'losing' (Don't be a 'loser'!;-))? Is there something you always wanted to try but didn't have the time or energy? See this as a fresh start, an opportunity to become a whole new version of yourself? Also, bear in mind that humour really is the best medicine and can really help you see things from a new and and helpful perspective. (And you probably need that more than anything right now?) 6. Learn to love change. It’s the only thing we can rely on so why resist it? Movement is life. Resistance causes pain, and pain causes suffering so don't fight your cravings and withdrawal- they are your training ground! You are the captain of your own ship so when the sea gets a little rough (and it will on occasions) embrace it and sail with it in the full knowledge that the cravings will pass as they are merely your ‘addictive voice’ desperately urging you to ‘feed’ it. Be like the surfer who rides the waves rather than going under them and don’t be frightened of making mistakes as they are your guides! (and if you learn from them they are NOT mistakes, just necessary parts of the process). Likewise, your cravings are testing you and therefore you can choose to experience them as your greatest teachers so be open to what they have to teach you about yourself? About life? Be up for the challenge and remember- change is a on-going process not an event so go easy(tiger!!) Consider the possibility that, ultimately, it’s your ongoing commitment to paying attention and your willingness to remain totally present, each and every step of your journey to freedom (and beyond!), that will be the deciding factor in determining long or short term ‘success’? You also might want to seriously consider reading the book 'Changing for Good' by James O Prochaska which is a particularly helpful tool for those who want to make positive and LASTING change in their life. Several of us here are finding it to be an indispensable tool. 7. Greet and encourage newbies ;-) I also strongly urge you to watch these short videos and ask yourself, "do I want to remain part of the (major!!) problem or become part of the solution?" The second one might be considered to contain 'triggers' but I make no apologies for saying that the very least we can do is view the 'reality' at least once and I'll tell you before I saw this videos I was determined never to use pornography again but after seeing them I KNOW I won't... “The lie tastes sweet at the beginning, but bitter at the end. The truth tastes bitter at the beginning, but sweet at the end." ~Buddha http://www.faithit.com/sex-trafficking-major-sporting-events-shocking/ http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=7df_1323733520 http://nefariousdocumentary.com/ http://www.indiegogo.com/ Wishing you all the love in the world and all the very best with your fresh start Fantastic new genuinely independent internet TV channel. http://www.thepeoplesvoice.tv/
