The 2019 X90 Hard Mode High Accountability Elimination Challenge

I was actually a bit depressed and was pretty vegetative, inactive. Need to work on my habits more. CHecking in for Day 2.

 

THe thing is men and our D have such a natural association, its like a go to a friend. Bet you cant just jerk off watching a football game and jerkn if you see a hot girl (man in your case) in th stands. We can do it easily. Thats not even when I a=bored, more like nored because my team is losing or a sad boring draw. Haha. Pathetic

 

Day 30 Check In. No PMO.

 

Grats on your 50 days, well done!

 

Hey, sorry I should have made it a bit clearer, I relapsed in the challenge since looked at P website for 5 minutes on Monday, which I immediately regretted and didn't even MO to. So I thought I'd continue to count my days in 2019 No MO since I didn't fully relapse and restart my counter for the challenge. Thought It would be make me still commit to continuing rather than relapsing completely and going back to PMO, since I can still count the days I've completed without MO in 2019 and have not MO'd since December.

I regretted even scrolling though the porn website and kept scrolling unconsciously hoping maybe I would feel a sudden rush of excitement from it, but felt more guilt that I hadn't committed to staying away from porn and didn't want to relapse. At least now I know I gain nothing from visiting porn sites or PMO.

 

Checking in day 31. Congrats to everyone for sticking around for a whole month!

 

Checking in day 4 no PMO

Felt some urges in the morning and caught myself fantasizing about an ex during class haha. Oh well, just gotta stay on this trajectory now and observe all the fascinating things my mind is up to, accept it all, but then act differently.

I haven't been sleeping enough though these past few days and I can really notice it affecting my mental clarity and I get more urges. Will be more disciplined about the sleep this weekend.

 

Checking in for day 21

 

Checking in Day 5/90 (Day 31 No MO in 2019 since had viewed P on 28/01/19) Still going strong no PMO, getting back into routine and studying at university. keep it up everyone!

 

Checking in for Day 3. Solid and healthy day. No urges. Active and productive.

 

Checking in day 5

Been a somewhat hard day because of the sleep deprivation. I've felt urges to distract myself from thinking and being alone. Its like I've built a habit of not looking within when I'm stressed or similar.

But when I notice it and put it into words I just smile and my inner peace returns. I'm going to end the day by reading a chapter in the Power of now by Ekhart Tolle (thanks @I_AM_AWESOME for reminding me of this fantastic book)