Porn induced hocd

so I’m a 17 year old boy who has always liked women and dated them. But one time I was watching porn and I never watched gay porn or anything or transwoman none of that but just straight or lesbian and this one time a thought ran through my head as a girl and a guys where having sex in the video and I thought of soemthing about his dick and I instantly got super anxious shut off the video and started pacing in my room saying “I’m not gay” over and over. I have been watching porn since I was 12 and I’ve always chased around girls and I have had sex with 2 girls since hocd started and I loved the feeling with girls and it calmed me down from all the thoughts I get erections when I’m with my girlfriend still but after she’s gone the thoughts come back and I’m in therapy right now and I just need some help cause they pick at my brain all day and I get super anxious and sometimes I feel the urge to cry and stuff but please if I could talk to other people going through the same stuff I am that would help. I’m super anxious and I’ve talked with my therapist about it and he says that it’s intrusive thoughts but it’s so hard to try to quit porn cause they said a 90 day reboot will stop my thoughts and I’ll return to normal thoughts

 

Thanks but as I’m saying it’s just really hard dealing with hocd because it’s not you and goes against my morals and I still get erections from things women do but it’s just harder cause of the long porn usage and I just wanna know how to end this madness

 

Yeah I know I just have to get rid of porn to return back to normal cause the thought came after maybe 4 years of watching porn