OCD sufferer with severe PIED - on the brink of suicide

Oh my, that's a rough one brother. I cannot totally understand your situation man but what I can tell you is that the fact you have actively taken the step to be apart of a community where everyone here is trying to achieve the same goal, is an outstanding first step. Many NEVER even reach the stage of admitting that they have a problem, they just go about thinking "you are supposed to like this stuff" but they never get how low it can make you feel. What I can say, man, is that you're young, clearly self observant and intelligent and willing to want to change. To take one's life often seems like a wonderful ticket out of this life, but I am telling you, man, it is not worth losing your life over. We are all going to die someday and when that happens all the pain will go away and we will rest but in the meantime, Allah has put us on this Earth for a reason man. Life is filled with challenges and that's the point, to use these challenges to become stronger, to overcome the trauma. You may have faced a lot of struggles in your 20 plus years on Earth, that I cannot even fathom to think of, but I promise you, man, there is SO MUCH more good waiting for you out there in the world. Never focus on the bad or the past, just focus on the future, on the new allowing Allah to guide you, man. Allah knows best. He put you here for a reason, he specifically gave you this struggle because he knows YOU CAN OVERCOME it. I know you can overcome it and deep down I think YOU know you can overcome it. We all can. We all will. Best of luck my brother. Love you man. Stay focused.

-From another university student

 

Don't despair at all, your situation is far from hopeless.

Just cutting out porn on its own probably won't make much of a difference, at least in the short term. You're almost certainly going to have to cut out MO for a time as well. If you go on the 90 day reboot hard mode no PMO, then you should hopefully notice a difference in your situation.

 

I have a different faith but i would like to ask you to stick with where your strength lies, and in this case, your religion. I assure you, my brother, that i have been through times as dark as yours. I was down with a incurable condition and there is no cure other than having to go for treatment at the hospital frequently. The point is, i have made "mistakes", committed "sins" as well and even now, i am on this forum because i too want to overcome this problem. I feel the commendable thing is you know what you want, which is to regulate your habits and now it is just about going through the cold turkey, the tough part. Sometimes, it takes another preoccupation to fight a preoccupation. For example, i feel if you like video games, then whenever you feel the urge for MO, quickly get on your video games. Because if you like video games, chances are higher that you can stay glued to it until your MO urge fades away. I am also trying to exercise daily which i read burns the testosterone in people with high sex drives and do some meditation which improves mindfulness. This will give you more will and brain power to fight these subconscious bad habits.

I hope i give you encouragement, my brother. We can do this, we just need patience, determination and discipline. Let's do this.

 

I live with OCD and can understand that sometimes this can make progress more difficult.
Have you thought about some good professional counselling at all ?
I have found it personally helpful in getting through some stressful times.

 

Yes, i feel u should also take up Warwick's recommendation. I feel like i have undiagnosed ADHD, with the short attention span and anxiety as well, more prone to bad habitual behaviour. Sometimes, only professionals will understand what we go through. Highly encouraged!

 

- 80 days is very little time. I've had very bad days recently, even tho I am past 14 months clean. And I don't even M!
- Abstaining from MO is essencial!
- It's possible to recover with MO but it will take much more time in my estimation.

Plan for a 2-3 years recovery. I'm sorry, but do not expect to be healed sooner than that.

 

You are new here. I suggest you learn a little bit before you speak nonsense.

 

I didn't say 2-3 year is average. It's my guess for someone that, despite being "on the brink of suicide" is not serious enough. Yes, you don't sound serious as you are still MO-ing.

If this was the case you wouldn't be asking if it is ok to keep MO-ing while you are just in your first weeks of your reboot.

I didn't want to come across blunt either, but it is better to accept the truth than to fool yourself.