MY BALLS ARE CARRYING SO MUCH CUM , NEVER FELT MORE LIKE A MAN

I woke up today with a huge rock hard erection , and my balls carrying all that seamen , i just finished week 2 of NoFap hard mode , after 1 year and 5 months normal mode streak and then a relapse 2 weeks ago , now let this be a motivation for you , you will excel in almost all areas of your life after holding on to your seed of existence , which is your seamen , i have evolved rapidly throw those 2 weeks in almost all areas of life , here is a brief description of my every day habits so far : Meditation - eat fruits - read the book the power of now & a new earth ( simultaneously) , take a general fashion design course online - take a specific fashion skill course online (sewing , knitting , sketching etc .. ) - working on my print on demand online store and designing 1 new artwork per-day and posting it on various products - searching how to start an actual clothing line online with minimal start up money - just recently started exploring YouTube and how to do YouTube automation videos without showing my face or identity on there ( no time to play a character and be a dancing clown to entertain people and get more views ahahahhahahahah )- learning 2 new languages french & Czechs simultaneously throw various resources online ( courses , videos & tv shows with subtitles) & i'm already fluent in English and Arabic , praying throw out the day multiple times , jogging at the after noon , eating vegan food , lifting weights in my bedroom (i have 2 dumbbells 15 kilos and 2 dumbbells 8 and a half kilos and a bar bench) , i go out at night and socialize and talk to as many human beings ( males and females) as i can without being needy or too nice , and at night i watch an action thriller or action comedy movie that i downloaded earlier in the day ( mostly James Bond movies or the same action packed guns blazing , car chases , explosions and crazy stunts , one immortal man against the world that never dies no matter how much he gets shot , stabbed , burned , blown up , fall from high altitudes or hit by cars , John Wick type of movies hahahahahhah) - now at the end of the day i'm beat up there is hardly any consciousness left in me , i go to sleep around 11 or 11:30 pm , i just collapse on the bed and fall a sleep in 2 minutes flat , after doing all that all day , there isn't even time to watch porn or even think about porn , even if a thought of porn or masturbation arose in my mind , i would already be doing a task that i have to focus on it anyways or i'll mess it up , so the thoughts just fades away quickly , keep your self busy , find your passion , and live life to the fullest , be the type of person that you wish to meet someday and liberate yourself from the imprisonment of the mind , and you will experience life from a whole new resuloution , just like if you're watching a YouTube video on 144 definition quality , then you watch the same video on 4K quality , you'll be like what the fuk , i wasn't even alive before , i just got reborn now , lol , Be the type of person that when your feet hit the floor in the mourning , The Devil say : Fuck , He's Up ! AHAHAHAHHAHAHA life is waaaaaaaaaay short to live in fear or pain .

 

Lol , Thanks Dude , for sure not Fapping helps with not needing approval from anyone , starting from online users to your mom or dad , and every one in between ( siblings - friends - relatives - neighbors - work colleges - class mates - activity mates - people in public ) , because you'll be already grounded in your essence of Being , and in a state of inner contentedness with oneness , so you'll already feel connected deeply with every human on earth as if you know them or good friends or family members of yours and the illusion of separation dissolves , so in that state you could spend years sitting in a cave staring at a rock , or going out to bars and clubs every night and talking to tons of people and you would feel the same in both situations , a pervading sense of joyous bless and well being , at that point you can simply choose to make new friends , business associates , acquaintances , female friends , intimate partner/s lol , or any type of social connection/relationship , simply because you enjoy it , however , you're no longer deluding yourself into thinking that getting approval or praise from any one will add something to you that you don't already have , in that state of presence and conscious immortality , people can feel your power and inner peace , and the tables are then turned , and they are the ones who are seeking your approval , and want a taste of what you have/are , which is Love , Joy , Serenity , Conscious Presence , Mental Quietude , Stillness , Solidity & Inner Peace. Also the end result of any external goal weather approval , relationships , money or any professional pursuit is 1 out of a Million compared to the Joy , Fulfillment & Euphoria that you get from THE WORK ITSELF , it is the work itself that enliven & energize you.

 

Lol , well , there are several definitions on different forums for the moods , however , how i go about it , is :

Easy Mode : No Porn - But still allowed to masturbate every once in a while (preferably without using hands and squeezing Wang with the infamous Anaconda Death Grip and leaking the life out of it ahahhaha - still allowed to edge but without using hands , could be by dry humping a soft pillow or other similar ways , lol) - still allowed to have sex with an actual real life humanoid female creature - Still allowed to Orgazom & Ejaculate .

Normal Mode : No Porn - No Masturbation - No Edging - Still allowed to have Sex and Orgazom & Ejaculate (However it's preferred to have Sex & Orgazom without Ejaculating Seamen & have multiple long Orgazoms , it's difficult to achieve but possible , i red about it on several articles and websites online)

Hard Mode : No Porn - No Masturbating - No Edging - No Orgazom - No Ejaculation - Still allowed to have Sex with a human Female but without even reaching the starting point of the Orgazom , it's a little challenging , but also possible with practise , and the body releases the exess seamen in wet dreams during sleep.

This is the Boss Level , lol , Monk Mood : No Porn - No masturbation - No Edging - No Orgazom - No Ejaculation of Seamen - No Sex or any type of Physical Contact with Females (except maybe shaking hands but not holding their hands for more than 3 seconds LMAO) - & not even any Digital Exposure or Entertainment usage (Movies , Music Videos , YouTube Videos , all Social Media Platforms , Video Games , TV , Radio) as almost all of those contain Sexual Imagery/Content which can easily cause trigger & relapse , not even listening to most songs as almost all of them contain Provocative Sexual Auditory Stimulation like a girl moaning or a guy singing i wanna have sex i'm horny all the time ahahahhahah - Still Allowed to Listen to like Techno or any High Vibration Music that doesn't contain any Visible or Subliminal Sexuality and preferably without any Lyrics - and in this Monk Mood it's preferred to spend most of the day in the outdoors doing activities like Hiking , Mountain climbing , Meditating in Nature and minimize the amount of time spent indoors.

PS: in this Monk Mood after a certain period of time there will be Supernatural Capabilities like Mind Reading People , Predicting the Future & Finally... Ascension into the sky !!

 

Lol

 

I've ben attempting to Let Go of Porn & Masturbation since 2016 , it's then when i read about the NoFap and i then i knew i had a serious problem , because i've ben masturbating since 2003 i was 11 years old , but from 2003 to september 2005 i was masturbating like once every 2 to 5 months and it wasn't to internet porn it was to play boy type of magazines like lanjeriea models and bikini models and topless nude girls/women , but that was it , it was a still picture on a paper magazine , from september/october 2005 we had high speed internet connection installed (it wasn't really that high speed compared to now lol) , and things started to go downhill from there , like i wish i knew about NoFap since that age or before , but anyways , it's not too late to save myself , i'm 28 and a half years old now , also from 2005 to 2011 it was like normal man and woman or 2 lesbians just regular normal porn , then from 2011 it escelated to the most horrific tramautizing porn like bondage , rape , transexuals , horse or donkey with woman lol , gay , gang bang , bukaki , toys and dominatinig bdsm , so yeah since 2016 when i read about NoFap , i started to try to quit but it went like a few weeks then relapse , then like a month then relapse , then like maybe masturbate at ethe end of each month for like a few months then like a streak for 2 or 3 months , but i noticed that the longer the streak the longer the times i masturbate after the relapse , like i had a streak for 2 and a half months in 2018 then i kept jerkin off to porn like several times when i relapsed , except for this last one on this past 3rd of September this month 2020 , when i relapsed after my long streak i only jerked off a couple of times and it was to normal porn man banging a chybby woman ( i got a thing for plus sized girls) ahahhahahha

 

Well, Actually when i started NoFap in 2016 , for the first 3-4 days was really easy , i had no resistance or no craving to porn or masturbation at all , because i was really depressed as fuck from doing too much pmo , but then after the first 3 or 4 days the urges hit harder than Thor's Hammer on Hulk's Face in The Avengers hahahahhaha , like literally i could feel my body shaking and i begin to sweat and experinceing massive panic attacks and irritations no difference at all from a heroine junky or a crack head who was addicted for many years and then suddenly stopped taking the drugs , i strongly believe that the grey matter in my brain structure was so deformed that it was the cause of lot of the thoughts of suicide that i had , it was really really intolerable to live with this demon inhabiting my soul , it can actually drive their host to suicide , even many of the seemingly externally "successful" people who got a lot of money , fame , statues , accomplishments , ect... that watches porn and masturbate , are internally Wrecked , Scared and broken , i never bought into the believe that there are people that can watch a "healthy" amount of porn and lead a successful life , there is no "healthy" or "moderate" amount of porn , just like there isn't a healthy amount of cokain or heroine that one can consume lol , anyways , so at the beginning of my nofap journey it was really really challenging to get past a week , and as expected the relapse after the first week felt sooooooooooooo gooooooood lol just like i gotta hit of crak after being clean for a week , and that dynamic kept happening throw-out my entire NoFap journey until just recently this pandemic happened in lat february 2020 , like no matter how long i went clean even if for 6 months , during that whole time , i was counting the days , in eager and anticipation for the time that i'm gonna relapse and get to get my fix of porn again and fantasizing about oh what it would feel like to watch porn again , and i had to force myself to abstain from pmo , and keep reminding my self of the destructive effects of porn on the pysichal mental/psychological emotional spiritual financial social intimate & professional aspects of life , but then there is a shift in mindset that happened when the virus lock-down first started , when i was hit with the reality of being locked indoors forced to just sit there in a concrete box doing nothing , that hit even harder than Hulk's Smash ahahhahahah, i was like nooooooooooo , this isn't life , this is not living , God did not Reencarnate me on this physical dimension so i would just sit there , waste my time , youth , energy , vitality , health , consciousness , dignity & manhood one fap at at a time !! , so then i realized the meaning of why do i really want to completely stop this disgusting anti-life habit , that made a complete difference and shifted how i go about my nofap journey , when i found the reason , the meaning , the point of why i want to stop porn completely even jerkin off alltogether , which is for me personally , was when i'm on my death-bed or whenever i feel death creeping in and when all forms , illusions and false self identification falls apart , i don't want to be like : oooooh maaaaaaaan i really fucked up , i wish i didn't waste my life away , i wish i lived a life that made me proud of myself , i could've lived an incredible life , instead i choase to jerk my life off . so that pain of regret and the feeling of loss of time and life , and the fact that i wasted them away my self , was so horrific and heavy just picturing it , i couldn't even imagine living that moment in real life at the end of my life , and i actually visualized my family & friends & people i touched their heart sitting at my funeral and talking about me saying yeah he just wasted his life away jerkin off to porn and was sad , life-less & pathetic human being as opposed to he was a phenomenal human being who brought joy and peace to many people and helped a lot of people and accomplished remarkable things to humanity and the world , and imaging my obetchwary or my tombstone writing : Here lies ForceMaster (my real name lol) he was addicted to porn , it destroyed all areas of his life and destroyed other inisint people lives around him that they loved him, as apposed to : here lies force master he will be remembered in all of our hearts and all the people his life force touched and will be immortalized on this wall among the most influential human beings of all human kind history . , so that fear of pain & regret , the want to avoid that intense pain of regret and guilt , was so powerful & compelling that it annihilated any fleeting pleasure or sensation of porn/masturbation , human beings in general are more drawn towards avoiding pain than towards gaining pleasure , for example if you want your friend to start lifting some weights or jog , you wouldn't tell him yeah you should work out to get attention from girls and validation & approval from guys and look cool and have high status friends and fuck more hot chicks lol , No , you would tell him , how would you feel if you grew up into adulthood in your 30's and 40's still skinny & thin or overwieght and unhealthy ?! , so long story short , yeah , since that shift , nofap has become effortless , i don't even count the days any more , as when i count the days i'm unconsciously programming my brain that there is a reward waiting in the future , and that reward no matter how far you waited for it when it comes (and it inevitably will come as long as i'm counting the days) it will come in the form of , you guessed it , porn , masturbation , orgasm , the same habit that is deeply imbeded in the roots of the subconscious mind from years and years of abusing one's self , so i'm on Day X now , where abstaining from pmo is just a life-style , it's not even something i think about anymore or have to resist or come up with techniques to fight it , i just don't have it , but what i would urge you to do is not levels by-passing , like if you feel that you're still in a critical position on your journey , then you can use those techniques and motivations to plow throw the demons , like you could use the reward part to motivate yourself , like oh yeah if i stop jerkin off and porn , i'll fuck more hot chicks and have a stronger erection and delayed ejaculation or big muscles and less fat and 6 pack abs or make a lot of money or become more conscious or successful in any endevour , you can use those motivations when you're in the begging or intermediate stage of your journey , then later when you reach a more advanced level , you can use the pain part as the reason and meaning , and ultimately come up with your own meaning , for example for someone who has a certain illness and nofap can help cure his physical or mental illness , that could be his meaning at the advanced level , for someone else it could be those external stuff that's the ultimate meaning to him like the statues , money , fame , success , or for someone else it could be the spiritual side of the spectrum like having inner peace and not live in agony or shame or guilt all his life and having serenity , peace of mind , relaxation , fulfillment , love , joy , happiness , mental quietude and no longer being tormented by or trapped in his mind , that could be the most powerful reason why he's really fed up with pmo , to avoid pain & gain fulfillment/pleasure . God Bless Brother

 

That's Awesome Bro , God Speed in all of your Endeavours !!