The Lord of the Rings Challenge

Day 2 people..
I m happy
Was feeling desire to fantasize but I know that is gateway to reset so I proudly rejected them...
Rest was reflecting my losses in these three years
Guess what... I lost a lot.. A lot
But now I intend to change every single bit of whatever I have damaged starting with my brain chemistry

 

Day 24,

Active morning and going to be taking a few days off from running I think to focus on school (plus my hips and back have been pretty bummy so we will try to bring everything back into balance).

Best to you all Fellowship!

 

Congrats!

Good tips, thanks man! And congrats!

 

264 days the stairs of Cirith Ungol
339 days no PMO, semen retention

I just declined to date a beautiful 18 years old girl at the gym who approached me and told me I have a celebrity vibe. Because I knew she wasn't the one, I'll not love her. If we have sex she'll become attached, I'll probably break her heart.
This nofap journey is making me a better person.

Big hug fellowship

 

Day 343. Planning to continue celebrating Easter!

 

Day 2

 

Day 8
I experienced a little more urges today but I am also met with feelings of excitement. I am ready to continue this journey

 

260 days

 

Day 8 check-in (Attempt 4) - Uruk-Hai

 

Day 0 -- an Orc. The spell of porn evil (though for me it's masturbation evil) is strong in me.

For a long time my biggest hurdle was five days into the streak. Now it seems to be eight. This is something I can fight head-on.

 

Back to zero.

Stupid brain going up and down and in circles, and I keep on failing.

I kind of feel like giving up for a time.

I know I shouldn’t but that calendar in my rook just staring at me, and coming here every time and telling you guys I’ve failed again, it’s just hard.

 

day 17

 

You can do this baby Yoda the force is with you.

 

Checking in on Day 121.

 

Day 50
Day 5 no N.F
I am going to destroy this ring once and for all !

 

Hmm...I really dont know where to start.
This post might get too long and convoluted so i'm apologizing in advance.

I was last posted on this forum somewhere around November last year.Shortly before relapsing.I blamed my relapse on my overusage of the forum(or something like i didnt really think much i was pretty angry after the relapse).Anyway i quit the nofap forum.
After that very relapse tho i was more determined than ever...and long story short i "did it".90 NOFAP(that was my goal for more than a year since i discovered nofap).I was very proud of myself and i was experiencing pretty much all the benefits i have read of.Things were great.But..
Now for some background on my fall after that 90 day mark.I have no girlfriend atm soo i decided it was a good idea to download tinder with my newfound "superpowers" ,confidence and whatnot.Anyway things didnt go as planned.I was basicly just scrolling pictures of almost naked girls for hours...Kinda resembels something huh.
So at day 91 (ironcly) i relapsed.Now i understand that nofap should be done just for counting days or for women,but that kinda what i did(now i know better...i think).Shortly after that relpse there was another one cuz ofcourse there is.And then i got back on my feet.I am curently(arguably-you will see why in a moment) on another pretty good streak.31 days(counting days is cool huh?).ANYWAY...I got trough the flatline period we all know and love and now(finally) comes the reason i am writing all of this nonsence.I browsed for prostitutes...I have never been to one.I feel pretty dirty just for thinking about it.Again browsing naked pictures of girls(and trans-the main reason i want to do nofap for) and this time considering paying them for sex..Wohoo...Go me...After that basicly edging i was like okay lets fap now.But i didnt.Finally some self control from my side.Instead i remembered this forum and started writing this..So after all of that my thoughts atm.1)I feel better and more determined now(i think).2)I am still confused do reset my counter or just go along with the curent one.3)What to do from now on to prevent this situation from happening a third time.4)Kinda feeling sorry for anyone who read this whole post
So yeah.Thats pretty much it.

Chears brothers and stay strong!

 

Checking in. Spring is here, which means spring outfits. One of my goals is to continue to work on who controls my attention--a random pretty girl on the street, or me? I will not be a slave to a summer dress. To that end I am revisiting this Zen parable:

A senior monk and a junior monk were traveling together. At one point, they came to a river with a strong current. As the monks were preparing to cross the river, they saw a very young and beautiful woman also attempting to cross. The young woman asked if they could help her cross to the other side.

The two monks glanced at one another because they had taken vows not to touch a woman.

Then, without a word, the older monk picked up the woman, carried her across the river, placed her gently on the other side, and carried on his 
journey.

The younger monk couldn’t believe what had just happened. After rejoining his companion, he was speechless, and an hour passed without a word between them.

Two more hours passed, then three, finally the younger monk could contain himself any longer, and blurted out “As monks, we are not permitted a woman, how could you then carry that woman on your shoulders?”

The older monk looked at him and replied, “Brother, I set her down on the other side of the river, why are you still carrying her?”

 

Hey folks. 1 day. Feeling good about it. Some temptations last evening. Went snowboarding yesterday. It was awesome. Used to my new snowboard and boots now. Had a blast. Stopped to take rests in the middle of some runs. First one I was blown away by the quiet and peace I had in my mind. Like nothing I have ever experienced. It was awesome. The other breaks were like that too. The quiet and peace was shocking. I may have been relapsing but I have obviously been making progress as a person. That gives me hope. Gotta keep at this. I will get through.

 

Checking in.

St. Joseph, pray for us!

 

Day 222.
Countdown to Elf King: 3 days

It seems like many are still locked on the features of a woman (at least on some level), still focused on avoidance. This is not the way to go. Avoidance need be avoided (ironically speaking). You have to grow in a different direction. You have to train yourself to live differently.

If you would like to eventually get into a serious relationship, why would you go through a dating site (app)? Your first judgement is on looks, touched up pictures from a single flash of an instance of how a woman looks. What about the other 99.99999999999999% of the time? If you want to eventually find someone you must not go through the internet. There, physicality is the primary focus. This is horrible. There are a plethora of dimensions to a woman.

Any attempt to go on sites such as Tinder and Instagram is only an excuse to feel that dopamine rush. Nothing else. That person in the photos, in our minds, is not a person. She is just a source, an object to activate your feel good. Don't do that to those women, don't support them in that fashion. It is a selfish endeavor. Stay away from such things.

When it is time to find a companion you will know. How do I know you will know? It is in your essence. You just have to clear the clutter in the mind. She will not be found on-line. And if you believe in soul mates it would be terrible for your future soul mate to have to wait for you as you go and get dopamine shots from objects on a screen (that is what they are to your brain).

Get well soon!