Once addicted always addicted? Your personal PoV

Somehow true!

Once you addicted, you can't go back like when you haven't. But, that's won't make us losing hope! We can be dragged back to our addiction if we working on it (peeking, etc), while the opposite is also true.

Although I personally know that I can't really make this addiction simply poof from my life, I always willing to suffer in order to make this addiction negligible to affect my life. I was a game addict before so I can say that some part of me still a game addict. Although I never make him grow by playing games.

I hope this gives you what you want, cheers!

 

In my PoV, once addicted always addicted. It is a lifetime fight between us and our addiction. We DEFINITELY lose by our own negligence. We should never test ourselves doesn't matter how long is streak.

 

I think it's like heroin or any powerful addiction. It's something you figure out is very harmful to yourself and others around you. I would only say it's a life long addiction if one doesn't stop. I mean if one stops they're not an addict any longer. But it also means you can't go back. That could be a lifelong struggle. But it doesn't have to be. I know former heroin addicts who don't struggle at all. Much of it depends on the individual i think. Some people say I want to use but I'm not going to. For them it may be more of a struggle than say someone who genuinely doesn't want to use anymore because of the destruction in their life. It's a good and complex question you ask. Thanks

 

This is all just my opinion and based on my experience but I would say that the addiction is always there. When you first give up PMO it'll be difficult in the beginning. You'll have many urges and cravings and try to justify going back to it. But as time goes on the addiction will lessen and you won't think about it as much, but it's always there in the background and knowing that you can fall back into it very easily is part of the recovery.

 

Well said. I'm probably just getting hung up on the wording. I agree with you. I actually believe a porn addiction could be harder to kick in some ways than a heroin addiction. Porn is always readily available. Even when you don't want to see it you see it. Also, though porn is extremely destructive you don't have to rob stores to support your addiction. And that's not a good thing. Porn is too easy. Full disclosure I'm only a couple of days into being porn free. But you gotta start somewhere.

 

Yep, that's a big part of the problem for me. I actually prefer the more flirtatious stuff that you encounter in TV commercials or simply in walking through the supermarket sometimes.

I only successfully abstained once for a decent streak (2 years). I was always conscious of the risk of relapse, so I was constantly on guard. If I saw a pretty girl there was an instantaneous "red alert" and I would quickly look away and admonish myself. When I began to think this vigilance was too extreme and began to allow myself to watch old movies and things then I began to feel a mild pleasure from seeing pretty women and eventually I stumbled onto an old movie that reawakened the feelings of PMO (dopamine or whatever) even though it was a G-rated movie.

You can't get careless or relax your vigilance it seems.

 

I believe there are a couple of factors as to the notion of "once addicted always addicted". The first and probably the worst is the society of addiction, i.e., consumerism. Consumerism and addiction are two sides of the same coin. This leads me (and others) to the notion of the "addict mindset", which is irregardless of the "substance". I quote substance because of addictions like Porn and sex addiction. In this sense "once an addict always an addict", for the life cycle of any individual is shorter than the general flux of change that any society goes through. This takes into account society.

There is another perspective which is very individualistic, in a sense. That is to go beyond the "addict mindset". This is to find joy in the smallest of things on an everyday basis. This also implies that one detach themselves from the high paced thrill of the modern society (partying, binge watching videos, playing video games, etc.). The only thing that is keeping one in an "addict mindset" is the addict themselves, that is to say that they feel a sense of entitlement to the activity in which they thoroughly enjoy. This is a big reason why addicts can't stop. The notion of "my life, my choice" comes to mind. Sure, but is it REALLY your choice? This also ties to the fact that people think that our consciousness begins and ends with the brain (largely accepted by "rational" people). No, the brain is just a machine that we use, a very complex one. When you identify with the brain, which is just a small part of the society, there is no way you can move beyond the addict mindset. This also follows the line of the popular definiton of freedom, "I do what I want". No, you are driven by impulse, which is just recordings of the brain laced with dopamine. The antidote to addiction is to realize that you are not that which is recorded (memories and experiences of any type), and you can record anything you want. That is to say that you are free from the impulses, but this is too much to teach apparently to children.

 

Not true. You are not a tree. You are not an animal.
You have the most powerful tool ever created. USE it.

 

I don't think this is true. My belief is that, we fap because

1. we like to do pmo
2. we want it
3. we need it

So if you find an answer for all the above

1. why you need it
2. Why you like it
3. Why you want it in your life

then no more you need pmo in your life.
In vietnam war time. More soldiers are addicted to heroine and other plant drugs available there. US govt is concerned with this and started studying it, but they find that majority of soldiers quit there addiction when they are back home and united with there family. So here a change in environment change them and their addiction. In vietnam they get hooked to heroin as an escape from lonliness and anxiety due to war. So if we also find the reason of why we fap, then we can also escape from this.

N: don't waste time blaming porn and telling porn is behind everything, it's not. ( porn is bad ) you are not a porn addict, you are a sex addict. Realising that is the first step of escape from this.
N2: sorry for english.

 

I do not ascribe to the position of "once an addict, always an addict". If this were true, then we would need to call this process something other than recovery, for what are we recovering from if not addiction? And if we have recovered, we are no longer addicts but survivors. However, if we are to be forever labeled addicts then this process should be called perpetual maintenance, not recovery.

I was not born an addict and I sure as heck refuse to die as one.

 

I guess it depends on how you define addict.

I watched a video of an alcoholic who had been sober for a couple of years and it took him almost dying until he finally quit. He said that he no longer craves alcohol and that he has no problem being around it or with others drinking etc but did say that it would only take him one sip and he'd fall straight off the wagon again. So in that sense would you still define him as an addict? Has he recovered?

 

Hi

Thanks for your reply. Yes, many came home from Nam and kicked their habits. It's been studied for years how they were able to do it. I'm not sure it's solely because of an environmental change. I think it was probably because they were tough as nails.

I'm not actually blaming porn for my addiction. I'm solely responsible. But porn is everywhere. Not necessarily hardcore but one can't escape from it whether it be pornographic innuendo in nightly sitcoms or suggestive softcore advertisements. You can't help seeing/hearing it. I feel bad for the children growing up today.

 

i rekon the only way to truly recover, is to dive into your past and face the wounds that made you an addict in the first place, unless you have the courage to do this then we will be fighting this fight forever without ever knowing ourselves

 

I would agree with @OhWhenThe . As others have said, it's never an addiction you can forget about since there's always going to be reminders, but I'd like to think I will get to a position where it doesn't bother me, it doesn't affect my daily life in the slightest.

However for the rest of my life I know it'll be something that I just don't have the self control to regulate usage of, so will have to steer clear.

Just musing on this further, it is an odd one in the sense that so much of it is visual cues, at least for me. Perhaps that is the same for an alcoholic? I don't know. Should we be looking to get to the position where we can "safely" look at what would have been an alluring image, appreciate it for what it is without that having to be a trigger, in the same way that the alcoholic who is recovered can look at the bottles without problem, he just can't drink from them?

 

In my opinion, someone who addicted is suffer from something that not the addiction thing itself. Like someone who addicted to alcohol, they're not really like to drink all day. They just want to escape from the pain, same as porn addiction. People not really like to watching porn, but porn give us some relief thing, it gave us instant pleasure from our pain. People with addiction is actually suffering from that kind of pain, not the substance

Yes people who addicted to something will being an addict forever. I mean no matter what days you on, the urge is still there and our brain still remember the pleasure we can get when we watching porn. But when we know how to deal with the pain in a healthy way, that will be our way to healing. So the mission is not to eliminate the porn thing, but to deal with the pain in a healthy way. I'm pretty sure that, anyone who get sober you meet will say the same thing

 

From a scientific sense, the PMO reward pathway in our brains will always be there. Abstinence only decreases the strength of that reward pathway, to the point where it becomes dormant.

Unfortunately temptation is a part of our life, and it doesn't matter if you've been away from porn for 10 days or 10 years, urges to watch it again will surface from time to time, especially in times of great hardship (and life is full of that).

So you could say "once an addict always an addict", but that does not mean relapses are inevitable at some point in future.

 

let me tell you what happened to me.
2019- I officially join nofap after 7 years of addiction to furry porn, and after attempting to get a girlfriend, (though I'd been clean for a few months prior, and quit masturbating soon after I joined).
despite some difficulties looking at fine art nudes on Lomography's website, I cleared my 90 days, and sometime after I was discharged from therapy because my depression had finally become manageable.
yet one month later, I triggered myself by revisiting one of the endings from starfox command, and suddenly I wanted to play the games again. I knew the risks, but I was going to be careful. (note, this ending was triggering in part because of my addiction, as it involved two characters growing apart and not recognizing each other after many years).
well, the apocalypse happened, I got the games, I was holding out good until the fall semester happened. and for numerous reasons, I was seriously stressed out and found myself drifting back to softer furry material...
time went on, and I started looking at harder stuff again.
yet... I still haven't masturbated in almost three years now and I'm able to pull myself away when I feel myself getting consumed.
some days, I don't even know what to do with myself anymore. do I consider myself a success or a failure? i'm stuck in some indistinguishable middle ground.