Two Different Pathways of Sexual Arousal - One Good, One Bad

So I deeply thought of something last night, and was inspired by this thought, and my understanding increased!

So I think there are multiple ways to feel sexual arousal....

1) feeling sexual arousal through intimacy with a partner - this is when two people are very attracted to each other and have warm feelings towards each other, which leads to sexual arousal

2) feeling sexual arousal through pornographic material and/or pornographic thinking - this is the ideas of getting hookers, watching porn, porn fantasies, having sex with random people

The difference is the pathway towards the sexual arousal. The first pathway, with a partner and feeling intimate feelings with them..... sexual arousal comes second. Sexual arousal is a byproduct of the connection between two people.

The second pathway, through pornographic material, goes straight to sexual arousal. There is no intimacy. It is just straight to sex.

I think this also explains partially why men tend to be more addicted to pornography than women. Perhaps women's sexuality more naturally falls into the "intimacy" category. She has to have feelings for the person before sexual intimacy occurs.

Maybe guys have a greater tendency to start right away at pathway #2 - pornographic thinking.

However.... I think pathway #1 can effectively destroy all desire for pathway #2.

But then the problem becomes, what if you are single, or an incel, or not around women... and your mind starts to think about pathway #2. If this is the case, perhaps the answer is to find intimacy from something else besides a woman. Devotion to a religion can be a good choice, or maybe close friendships.

I do not know the answer to a single man's dilemna if he is filled with sexual thoughts. But I think the two pathways described are pretty accurate

#1 --- Warm feelings/connection >>>>> sexual arousal>>>>> sex

#2 ---- sexual arousal >>>>>> sex

Which could explain why we feel so bad after PMO, because there is no warm feelings and connection

 

Thanks, yea I wrote this when I was in a different mindset. Today I’m starting to think that it’s horniness that drives us to seek out a woman.

The sexual desire basically forced us to interact with women and go out and do stuff.

This is why PMO is so harmful, it takes away that drive to go do things and talk to women and try to build a relationship with someone

After PMO, or just ejaculation in general, the desire has greatly lessened

 

Thanks, but unfortunately if I were that wise I would have been able to quit PMO by now. Just relapsed again yesterday, one time PMO on day 11