How does everyone confess their sin?

AP, AP groups. How about to a priest in confession?

 

Whoever you confess to, I guess one aspect is to keep it a bit uncomfortable, so that at the time of choice whether to fall or not you might remember how bad it feels when you will have to confess. And that thought might save you from sinning.

 

A very important aspect of a good confession is the time spent beforehand, examining one's conscience in preparation to confess. Indeed, a practice of examining one's conscience at the end of every day can provide some of the benefits of confession. None of us is perfect and probably none of us lives a single day in perfection. If we let our eyes linger on a temptation, for even a second, we can see a need and perhaps a method for improvement. In this way, we may not achieve perfection but we may meet excellence along the way.

 

I confess to a priest. I make sure to try and choose the same priest since having a regular confessor helps keep me accountable. If my confessor believes I don’t have a firm purpose of amendment then he will withhold absolution (John 20:23). Just my two cents, but if the person you’re confessing to can’t forgive or retain your sins, then you probably shouldn’t be confessing to them.

 

Are you Catholic? Does it happen that a priest would withhold absolution?

 

Yes. Yes, I have had a priest withhold absolution from me before.

 

Sounds devastating to me!

 

I am also Catholic. I have never had a priest withhold absolution although I know it is a possibility. I can imagine that would be a most difficult thing to hear but I am sure it would cause me to re-examine my conscience and consider what was in my heart.

The bible is replete with examples where God withheld His mercy but only after the Israelites had throughly demonstrated their desire to worship false idols and live their lives away from the One True God. In those instances, God allowed them to go to a place where their hearts already were. I feel He did not do this as retribution for their rebuke but as a learning experience to show them the emptiness, the loneliness, of the place they had been longing for. Ultimately, when faced with this rebuke, the Israelites repented. Sadly, the cycle did repeat itself, time and time again but at least some generations got the message and were saved.

 

Oh it was a shock for sure, but it helped me reexamine myself and my outlook towards the sacrament and my own behavior. Thinking I could use the confessional like a car wash was a sin of presumption of God’s mercy. It would be like hurting a friend, saying sorry, and then when tempted do something that would hurt them again, you say “it’s okay, he’ll forgive me” and then you hurt him. Likewise, when I would fall and get despaired and think “oh well, I’ve already fallen what does it matter if I do it again before confessing”, that is another form of presumption; it’s also just stupid since if you had a knife in you, you wouldn’t move it around making the wound worse.

Confession has taught me to stay away from two extremes: 1. Despairing of Gods mercy, thinking I’m so evil I can’t be forgiven and 2. Thinking I’m entitled to God’s forgiveness, which I’m not since it is a gift. No one’s entitled to gifts.

 

Wise words on all counts.

 

Hi,
A very important theme: confession.
Without confession, no health. According to James 5:16 "Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. "

Looking back, it was very difficult to open up to somebody for the first time.
I met a man in church, I learned to open up to brother-friends from church.
I started a professional traject where I could open up about literally everything.
I discovered a group from "Falling Forward" who organised weekly life meetings around recovery from sexual addictions. Looking each others in the eyes and confess how your week was, did a lot good to me.
The negative thing was that it costed me 2,5 hours traveling each week.

I've learned to opened up to a presbyter from church. He should be the first I would be able to confess my sins to.
Same with the vicars.
I jumped into the christian "celebrate recovery" groups (sort of a 12 steps recovery program).
For 5 years we had weekly meetings.
I asked an older man to be my coach and we have talked for hundreds of hours.
Especially in that time it was so amazing important to have somebody who was patient and not rejective.
So every time I felt back, I had to grab some courage together and called him after a few days.
He always welcomed me for another meeting where I then could confess what I did wrong.
Looking behind it would be more wise if he had learned that grace is not without boundaries.
In the end he seemed to be fed up with it. I guess he had issues with his own boundaries too.

I started another therapy traject, and was there in for 2,5 years.
Since a year God pointed me to a ministry in my neighborhood where they organize healing services.
Another perfect place to be able to open up. Plus people are annointed with the gifts of the holy spirit.
What I don't know or see, God shows others. Oh that is really amazing to be around these people!

Since I have been here on nofap, I had the idea to organize a weekly online meeting for men who feel the need to open up and pray together. I'm still open for this idea. I think that it can be a good way to help ourselves heal from our addiction. But a real life person is always better to confess to, because then you can't hide yourself behind a screen.

 

I might welcome such a weekly meeting, am from Europe as well (Finland to be more precise).

 

I was thinking about this post.
I am willing to start a weekly online prayer event.
If you are still open for it, the prayer group already exist of 2 people.