Havent masturbated in over 5 months..need opinions please.

How about this is the beginning of the new lifestyle you acquired. Sex or sex substitutes aren't everything.

 

I understand what you're going through. I went exactly through the same questions last month. I tried to jerk off again on december 28th for my birthday after 141 days of hardmode. I fapped without thoughts, just physical sensations. It was hum, kinda weird... Then I started to masturbate to thoughts, which was amazing. I never felt the need to escalate to porn.

The thing is, I couldn't do it only 2-3 times a week. Fapping created cravings and made me jerk off almost every day. At first, I still had the "superpowers" but I fell back into my old masturbation habits slowly, which made me feel lazy, anxious and depressed again. It's sneaky, you don't see it coming... I felt anxiety often and I jerked off to feel better, just like I did before.

I remember that just like you, I was like "ok, 5months, now what?". I figured that the best way to find out is to try it, and I don't regret, it made me learn more things about myself ! Try it too if you feel confident enough. Be aware of yourself and if you feel like you're falling back into your old patterns, start nofap again. Watch out though, I think that just like me, you were on your first real attempt on nofap, and let me tell you that the second attempt is way harder. If you jerk off once after a long streak, it's like you unleash a beast lol. Cravings are SO harder to resist... I'm on day 10 right now. In for a long streak but it's so much harder!

 

It is commendable that you have not had to reset your PMO counter for six months approx. But you have decided to keep masturbating to p/subs when you feel the urge and when you feel anxious. It is these two facts that contain the clues with which to answer your questions.

I suggest the answer to all three questions is, no. Forgive me for not remembering the details of your pre-NoFap history. But even with someone strictly adhering to hard mode six months with no P or M or O (except for wet dreams), is seldom enough to completely reboot. Considering that you have not followed that regimen, I would be confident in saying that you will have not have done so. So, you have healing yet to do, rewiring to continue and rebooting is still someway in the future. How far? Who can say.

There is no doubt in my mind that you must stop using p/subs. Do not underestimate their significance in interfering in your healing, rewiring and rebooting. If you want to keep jacking off, that's up to you, but all you are doing is prolonging the agony tbh. The tension you speak of will be eased with your wet dreams.

As for your anxiety. This is the other notable point (the first being the continued use of p/subs). Masturbation is often not a sexual act in our heads. It is a kind of brain-numbing tranquiliser that prevents us from addressing the issues that are causing the anxiety. Address them directly, and you will be much better off for it.

I hope my comments will enable you to take a fresh approach and give you something more specific to work at. Peace.

 

If i were y ou i wouldnt waste months of fighting on a 5 seconds o

 

thank you! I was just thinking about the same thing. I am on day 46, hardmode. These days, the urge is/was really hard to handle, lot of stress lately and well... "good, old" coping mechnanisms coming back to say hello.

"If i were y ou i wouldnt waste months of fighting on a 5 seconds o" exactly.
thank you for reminding me.
In my mind it looks like it will feel so good, but it wont. It is just a road back to where I came from, and I dont ever want that again.

Have a good night! and keep up the fight!

 

I'm pleased you found my feedback constructive. Btw what p/subs you have been using. And yes, Instagram is a killer!

 

I am new so forgive me, but not doing M at all seems... I don't know, is it normal. Is it ok for our bodies not to have the "release". Maybe its the addiction talking, but lets just say you go on hard mode and you don't have a partner for a while (year, maybe 2), then what. Sooner or later you will "explode", or are you guys saying that the "normal human mode" is not to have cravings/lust. Its like the difference between food VS alcohol addiction. You still need food to survive, but you don't need alcohol. Are you guys saying that M is the same way as alcohol. Sorry guys but I appreciate all the help and good luck to all you with your straggles.

 

Mastrubation is like McDonald's and wet dreams are like salad, you might be really hungry and want to eat McDonald's because you need it, but there is salad waiting for you at home, you just need to wait a bit longer. Best option is to not think about food until you get home, it is the healthiest option. This is the way I see it.

Also, in the same boat, day 69 and I had a dry dream that almost made me relapse. Really glad to see this thread as it made me realize that I want to do this as a life long commitment. The 90 day challenge is a great goal to set me on my way.

 

According to YBOP it can take up to 2 years for "young people" to fully reboot to pre-porn levels.
Might I ask, why don't you just get a girl to have sex with? You've got 5 months behind you. Do you think you'll enjoy masturbation over real sex?
Also there are people who never masturbate ever. So its not like you "have to" jack off like our society has embedded in our minds.

Just remember how you were before you started NoFap (death-grip, PIED, loss of sensitivity, ect.) and compare it to how you are now.

 

I did six and half months of 'hard mode' and I can feel major improvements, but I'm certainly not fully rebooted yet. Two years sounds realistic to me. If you don't relapse and to post-relapse binging all the time, then I think one relapse. But... who cares in the first place? If you feel a large need to know when you'll be done (done with what? Becoming a better person?) you certainly still have a long way to go. For me, NoFap is forever (or at least not fapping, without the community I mean), a lifestyle, as many others say as well.

I am sure that most girls will appreciate it when you love them for their company and not (only) for their body. Other than that, if you do not have moral or religious concerns, I'd just say: When it comes, let it happen. I just think that marriage is an institution created by humans and that having sex is natural and normal. However, if your girlfriend doesn't want to have sex before marriage then respect it and consider yourself happy that she's serious about it. She will certainly be a loyal wife to you later on who listens to her own inner voice rather than falling for society's lies about sexuality.

That's a lot of wet dreams... I only had a single during my whole NoFap journey, but I know that everything is doing well down there. I can feel it every day. Before I started NoFap I used to feel 'dead' in my crotch sometimes, which was depressing.

 

In my view, the primary benefit of waiting until marriage for sex is that you both have mutual commitment. I think it can work outside of marriage in many cases, but there is a lot more potential for heartbreak when you break up with someone that you have shared your body with than otherwise. That is my two cents. Best of luck in finding a partner though!

 

@Thechosenone

Seriously do you want me to answer your query? You do know my pain problem was MO rather than P? MO can be addictive and you can waste yourself due to an "overactive imagination"


Anyways the main reason for my response here is to say that 5 months goes damn quick. Do you remember how we started with 3 weeks apart and 37 days later i fucked up then i binged endlessly?! But you carried on going and toppled five months.

It feels like yesterday eh?

I hope you can respond to this and advise others on how quick time goes especially when you have picked up the streak!

Sorry am not being ignorant to your question or evading it but YOU know how MO is bad yourself!

Remember P is the third wheel to the MO. Think about that carefully. They are related together especially P and M.

 

and pussy is like a cold fruit smoothie on a hot summer day