Need support staying connected!

Hey everyone,

So this is my second attempt at using the nofap forum to give up PMO. I tried at the beginning of last year and went for over 4 months without! And then I relapsed. I go to watch it when I feel bored and rebellious, like I'm getting one over my girlfriend and other people who would disapprove. It's also like a treat to myself. When I have some perspective like now it's obviously ridiculous but when I don't have perspective....!

I know I'm addicted and I've made a commitment to quit from last week. I'm never going to watch P again. I need to share so it's not just me trying to win the battle in my own head, and share with you, who understands what a struggle this is and have decided to fight that battle too. It really makes a difference to me to see so many people working out ways to fight this and be free of it as well.

My first challenge is just to come onto the forum and post about anything at least once a day for a month, just to stay connected. If you can give me support please do!!

Thanks for reading,
Ed

 

Thanks! Yeah there's so much resource here! That link doesn't seem to be working for me though... will try it again later

 

Thanks! I had a good productive day today and no urges! Getting some posts in before midnight hour strikes! (UK time)

 

Thanks for the advice, will look into the app!

I've seen other people posting in a journal format which seems like a good idea so I'm going to give it a go.

So I'm on day 3!
I'm not getting strong urges atm but I was quite bored today and feeling pissed off which are triggers for me. I feel annoyed at my girlfriend and neither of us are supporting each other well at the moment which makes things harder. I know the situation needs to change but at the moment the impetus comes from me and she feels like she's not sure about the relationship. Problem is as soon as it looks like I've given up on it and moving on she's keen again! Anyway my commitment is that whatever happens I'm not going to use PMO. Bring on day 4!!

 

Thanks Kman20! I'm following you too and rooting for you! Good advice about the anger, I actually have friends who I can show how angry I'm feeling and get it out so it doesn't dominate things, it's just remembering that they can cope with that cos sometimes I feel like no-one can handle it! I think the reality is when it comes down to it they can!

 

Day 4.

Things are great! I had a good day, lots of energy, and felt a lot closer to my gfriend. Sometimes I forget just to have a laugh with her and be cheeky! I got some good advice yesterday from a friend to keep going after her even if it looks to me like she doesn't want me to. If she doesn't want the relationship and to be close then she can say, but actually she does love me and it's just that she finds it hard to show. Man, relationships can feel so confusing!

I think having this commitment to Nofap and some target is giving me a sense of purpose and that seems to make a big difference at how other things go. Still feels funny to me to post so openly on here but even that's easing up!

 

Day 5.

Late here so not going to write much, just that it was a good day generally with too much stuff to do to have any urges. going away for the weekend tomorrow and definitely won't be able to PMO so that's good. Have the feeling that I need to start putting my mind and energy into something big, something bigger than just my 'self-improvement'. Wow, deep!

 

Day 6

Off to a counselling workshop so getting in an early post and won't be able to post tomorrow. See you again on Day 8!

 

Day 8

Still on track! Been to busy to really have many pulls this weekend, though I notice I have to catch myself to not fantasize about women I'm talking too sometimes. It's annoying cos it's distracting and I worry they'll catch a look on my face and know. I think it's compromising.

Pleased on the commitment though, seems to be going well atm, need to keep posting even if things turn tough

 

That's really encouraging man, thanks

 

Day 9

Been at work all day and evening so again not much chance for PMO, still definitely at the stage where I have to be aware to avoid triggers or letting my mind wander. I mentioned to my gfriend I was posting on here regularly atm, she kinda laughed and said was what I did now instead of watching, I said yup and then we talked about something else.

Wish I had more to say but not right now!

 

Day 10

Still doing good, got a cold atm so not feeling great but not related to nofap I don't think. Going to do some more reading about theory of porn addiction and how it effects our brains, think that'll be tres interessant!

 

Day 11

Still going strong. I had stronger pulls to watch P this afternoon than I have so far, I was in the house by myself and meant to be revising. The pull had to do with a strange mix of feeling like I didn't have attention for any more study and reading things, particularly on the laptop, as well as lethargy and yet I knew I had loads of energy I needed to burn off. I've got really into climbing recently at a nearby climbing centre so went there. Exercise in these situations seems like a substitute. Started reading more on the terminology and theory laid out in the nofap community, realised I should be writing that I've given out PM and leave out the O as I'm still sleeping with my gfriend. Also I hadn't appreciated the difference between a relapse and a reset. The lifestyle and habit changes that go along with a reboot are such a huge part of it.

 

Day 12

Again felt a little more pulled to old habits than have done since started this journal, but writing here regularly means I feel like I wouldn't just be letting myself down. Good day generally, rediscovered the wim hof breathing exercises which are really amazing. Told some friends that I had quit and about the forum so that was cool! My gfriend left for madrid this morning for the week too. I'll be fine!