22 days

today is day 22 hard mode.

I wanted to share my experience so far because I always find reading other people's journals helps to motivate me, and helps me understand what to expect when rebooting.

The first week I found pretty hard, urges at this stage were pretty intense. I had to leave the house a few times when they were at their worst. At one point I almost relapsed, I'd decided I was going to, and convinced myself that because I was only on 2 days it wasn't that much of a setback to pmo, my dad got home just as I went to go up to my room and needed a hand carrying the shopping in, I was lucky. But I learnt from it.

Second week I still had urges but I found them quite manageable, until day 13. Day 13 was horrendous, Got home from work, no one home, picked up my iPad which I hadn't used for a while and had a porn tab still open, I closed the tab before it loaded but just seeing the name of the site was enough to trigger what was without a doubt the worst urge to Pmo Iv ever felt. But I resisted and went for a cigarette and calmed down.

Day 14 I went into flatline, which I am still in now. No libido, no energy, little desire to do anything really. But yet I still feel less glum and introverted, I feel positive, I know every minute I'm in this flatline my brain is rewiring itself and there's light at the end of the tunnel.

It's half 12 now where I am, so technically it's day 23

 

Congrats on your 13 day streak man. Yeah I'm not sure why I forgot to mention this, anxiety I find seems to come and go, I can be buzzing one day and completely awkward and introverted the next. Some days I want nothing more than to go out with mates, other days all I want to do is lock myself in my bedroom and be alone.

I find urges are at their worst when I stay alone at home though, so I try to go out and socialise as much as I can even when being around people is the last thing I want to do. This is about changing your lifestyle and habits, and I think socialising and taking up hobbies to replace the time you would have spent pmo'ing is crucial to succeeding.

Congrats on your progress bro, and keep it up! We can do this

 

Well said