Another relapse

Man, recovery is a bitch. For a whole week I've had bronchitis, rendering me tired all the time. I took one day off of work but I have to conserve my sick leave to use for when my son needs to stay home from school when HE'S sick. So I've been at work, kind of dragged, all week, surrounded as always by the truly beautiful women I'm always surrounded by. It was a nightmare. Plus my wife just went out of town for a few days. YIKES! I got through the whole week, but I finally just broke down and fapped to P. I'm trying to beat my best streak of 52 days, and I can't seem to get beyond 4.

I have to laugh at it, though. It's better than beating myself up. But I do need some encouragement. How many tries did it take the longest-recovering among you to finally hit a stride?

 

Thank you all. Yeah, I've probably tried to quit dozens of times over the 17 years I've had this problem, but never with the kind of determination and overall strategy that Nofap provides. I'm finding that I need to read and post every day. When I was on my long streak I lost focus and didn't come here, and kind of stopped thinking about it and took it for granted that I wasn't going to do it again. I of all people should have known better, you know? It's a problem that's surprisingly good at hiding and lulling you into lowering your defenses.

 

Late in the work day. Tired. Surrounded as always by the gorgeous, smart women I work with. So tempting to go pop a quick one in the bathroom. Alcoholics Anonymous has an acronym for the conditions under which people are most likely to relapse: HALT. That's for Hunger, Anger, Loneliness, and Tiredness, or any combination thereof. Maybe I should just get out of here before I do something I regret.

One day at a time.

P.S. I happened to listen to Queen's We Are The Champions last night for the first time in many years. One lyric leapt out at me:

I consider it a challenge before
The whole human race
And I ain't gonna lose