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Sex and Masturbation During the Rebooting Phase

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Stick, Aug 14, 2017.

  1. Stick

    Stick Fapstronaut

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    Hey,

    Wanted to share with you guys a couple of experiences that I had during the last 3 weeks, and get your advice about them - both morally and logistically.

    I'm on day 46 out of 90 of the total reboot.
    Since I stopped masturbating and watching pornography I could say that my life changed to a certain degree - positively, IMO.

    The first thing that happened to me, about 3 weeks ago, was that I initiated contact with an old acquaintance from work, and she invited me to hang out, first at a burger place out in the street, and on another date at her house, where we slept together.
    The nature of the sex was a bit shy and awkward, as it usually is on first times with new partners.
    I also believe that the fact that I didn't sleep with anyone for almost a year, and haven't masturbated in well over a month by that time, made me a bit squeamish. But that's not here nor there.

    The second event happened last night..
    I went out to drink with some lady friends of mine, and after we had some pizzas and beers and 3 rounds of whiskey chasers each, we spontaneously decided to walk down to the beach and bathe in the water.
    We went in with nothing but our underwear and then one of the girls took off her bra, and then all bets were off and we were, all 4 of us, naked in the shallow water, at about 1 o'clock at night.

    The thing is, two of the girls and I kissed and made out, and there was near (tip) penetration under the waves of the warm Mediterranean sea :)

    Main point being, later that night, at home alone in bed, I couldn't contain myself and my excitement from the situation, and I jacked myself off, just to be able to sleep for the remainder of the night.
    I DIDN'T use ANY porn or any other un-healthy stimulation, just my imagination and residual excitement from the event that transpired earlier.

    What do you think, guys?
    Should I reset my count? Does this mean that I am back at square one again?
    Is it even okay to have sex during this period? I mean, I hardly ever think of masturbation, only in difficult times mentally, and I never go through with it.

    Is this healthy behavior if it feels organic and mutual?

    Thank you for your attention and advice!
     
  2. ethan.s

    ethan.s Fapstronaut

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    I'd say that both events were very positive and healthy experiences! I wouldn't dwell on it too much, because obviously you must've had a great time. Getting back into real life and having these experiences with real people is a common goal in the rebooting process.

    However, in terms of resetting your counter, I'd say yeah you should. Your goals are defined as no P or M, and technically you did jack yourself off. Why lie to yourself about your goals? I read another post the other day about someone knowing they relapsed, but keeping their counter as motivation. If the day counter is truly an integral motivator for you, then I guess you could keep it up, but as I said before, you'd really be lying to yourself.

    So yes, I'd reset your counter. However, I wouldn't see it as too much of a setback either. I read your post in a positive light, and as somewhat of a success story!

    Edit: According to your goals, and in general *in my personal opinion, I'd say sex is okay during the rebooting process.
     
  3. Stick

    Stick Fapstronaut

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    Hey Ethan,

    Thanks a bunch for your response, made me feel a lot less self concious and just better about the situation.
    You're right! These are healthy experiences!
    (Hoping for more :))
     

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