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Today would have been day 7, however I O in sleep, sleep was shallow enough to be dreaming and to remember dream however i was not awake. I was awake shortly after that point. It's safe to say it will have been shallow sleep, so there could be responsibility for me to take possibly.
I was watching a film the night before with my family and there was a scene where the character was wearing revealing clothes, it wasn't sexual but the clothing was lightly see through. I don't know whether this caused a ripple effect, i do know when i fall asleep i have this feeling in my gut the night before its happened and it's this feeling of- 'i don't have the strength to fight urges tonight if they happen.'
Its like i check in with myself to ask will we be able to keep resist tonight? And the answer is 'no'. Like a tired no, then i don't work through those feelings toward a 'yes, i will try'.
I'm pleased that I haven't P/M or O'd consciously, I'm pleased with my progress and today has still been a good day, being here on this journey is what matters most to me, no matter my results so i am thankful but i see there is some digging I need to do. At the same time to conclude, i think i need rest. I think i will incorporate rest more to help this new habit. Lots of love everyone X
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